Web Diary

This is a record of the life and times of Hashim

Seeing as Hash told whoever Steff is about this link, I felt obliged to write something. My name is Henry.

I first met Hash in September 2003. Since then we have become best friends, and I have spent many a night in his room. He often used to push me around the room, holding me tight, telling me to suck harder. Then he would flush the bag down the toilet. After this, he would make me stand in the corner for hours on end until he felt he needed to use me again. Often he would let other people use me, and I felt that I was treated like an object.

He once blew a fuse, and didnt use me for months on end. Finally, he decided that he needed me so badly, that he relented and turned me on. We spent many a joyful day together making enough noise to annoy the girls upstairs. They then came down and asked if they could use me after!

After a major row over a blockage, we sadly drifted apart.

The last time that I spoke to him, he was seeing someone with a better body than me and a cyclic sucking effect.

I think that the new model is called Dyson.
Hello
- Wednesday, January 26, 2005 at 13:02:43 (EST)

Steff offhandedly mentione that he's found this link, so I thought I'd just say that anything written in this diary from.........oooh, now, ain't me.

In fact http://www.kett6.net/weblog/hash/hashspeaks.html don't know if that's allowed, but knock yourselves out.

Signing Out
Hash
A Disclaimer of Sorts
- Tuesday, January 25, 2005 at 06:07:05 (EST)

Ok, more vacuous tripe from the keyboard of Hash.

have done assorted shit, like taking long walks, working, working, erm, working, playing football and talking to a few people from uni, including, yes, you guessed it, Sian. Oh, and I've been working.

I'm not gonna write what we were talking about, but I'm gonna get me a livejournal very soon, which should rock...

THE SUBJECT LINE!

"Come the revolution, you'll be the first against the wall" Discuss. (40)

This subject came up in a roundabout way with Max. You have control of everyone, you have 3 questions, if they fail on one, then BANG! BANG! they're gone...

I didn't really get to decide cos I was WORKING (alledgedly) but I came up with:

1) Do you read the Sun?
2) Do you own a land rover in an urban area?
3) Are you Tony Blair?

Thats the 3 I came up with, the 3 things that bother me incredibly...The Sun, isn't even a proper FDUCKIN paper..*takes valium*....ah...sweet medication, eases the pain.

Think about it, you can off 3 major groups of people, who do you get rid of.

Anyway, heres' te incredibly unrelated lyrics...

So come, out of my shadow,
Where your shadow
Falls upon me

Come, back from your suicide
With that face that you hide
That only I can see

See I clearly do not fit,
In the plans that you've been makin'
And my sense is reawakened
With my memory
Come to think of it,
I think we should quit

Maduraga - I Don't Fit

Decksanddrumsandrockandroll
Hash

Come The Revolution, You'll Be First...
- Monday, August 16, 2004 at 19:20:17 (EDT)

Hey-hoo, I'm still here....

And I need deep heat (which on an unrelated note, is EXTERNAL use only)on my left calf, cos it's fucked off somewhere.

I'm starting to get into the habit of walking back from work, which is nice. And cos I need to get fitter...

Ah fuck it, not in the right mindset to write one of these, will do so when I regain feeling in my legs.

A Strange Air Of Mystery
Hash

Beautiful Son, Without Your Gun
- Saturday, August 14, 2004 at 18:15:13 (EDT)

Saturday nights' alright for fighting, YEAH!!

Actually, thats wrong, particularly if you're Mike Tyson. But lets not go into that.

Yep, its Saturday night, and I'm sitting at this computer, listening to Franz Ferdy... cos I'm a saddo.

Talking to Sián again over the old interweb about stuff, which rocks as always.

Uni is all about getting a degree right? WRONG. Uni is about getting those letters after your name, but its also about ahving a rocking time, doing what you want, being independent and also, most importantly, making the friends that you are most likely to stay in touch with.

Woah, that was a departure, wasn't it? Fromt he usual vacuous tripe that I write on here. But the point is this: Sián, Pete B and S, Mr Alan, Steff, Rhys, Angela and other people, are people who fucking rock, and some of them (you know who you are) will definitely be friends, for life. Just like Mr James and Rob, and El Gropo (Matt) will be from Sainsers. And as an afterthought, people from Kett and High School.

In the past couple of weeks, I'e realised I've come through an awesome test, although some people may not think so. Thats' fine. We all have our trials and our tests, and these will seem massive to you; the person having to deal with it. It is going through them, and helpng others, that make you a better person, being able to relate and show empathy to others: That is the test. For example, I couldn't have been through what Sián did last year (not gonna write it) but it was heavy...but hell, shes still there, and fighting. So, mate, you do inspire me, cos you were down and you got up and you did something about it. And that rocks. Standing there and taking it is not an option.

Maybe its my time of the month again, am feeling more emotional than I usually do.

To anyone going to university, make sure you dont caught up in the murky world of resits. Some people I know (thankfully, not me) have to do these, they screw yur summer vacation, and on top of that, they cost a whole whopping NINETY POUNDS A SHOT!

Anyway, heres some meaningful lyrics:

It has to start somewhere,
What better place than here,
What better time than now?

RATM - Can't Remember which song - something early I think.

Anyways...

I Told You I Was No Muse Last Time You Asked
Hash

Saturday Night
- Saturday, August 07, 2004 at 19:04:06 (EDT)

The following entry is dedicated to Sir Daniel of Fisher.

So, work. Love it. Yeah, not something I say often, but for £5.18, I'll love you too. (Hint).

Yeah, as I was saying, before advertising my services, they're gonna give me a week of money, for nowt. Holiday money, if you will. Add to the fact that all I seem to do is work there, and the rent is suddenly not a problem...he says, whilst eyeing an Ipod Mini.

Late night rocking at the moment: Hives - Hate To Say...

Was talking to Pete S. earlier, clever chap, passed all his exams: remember kids, Geology Rocks! (see what I did there?)

Sample quote in an email from Alan: "Have been making a fool of myself, and continuing my exellent form in that department". :D - Maybe you have to meet the ThatchMeister.

Anyway, if I can rattle this shit off the top of me head, then so can Mr. Fish...your turn!

Don't Make Me A Leader,
I'll Lead You All On
Just Let Me Sing Sad Songs
To Right All Their Wrongs

Hope of the States - 66 Sleepers to Summer.

If Vieira wants to leave, he is cordially invted to have sex with a gibbon
Hash
Our Rackets Are Here Because Of You All..
- Friday, August 06, 2004 at 20:25:56 (EDT)

Shrek 2 is a very funny film.

Yep, anyway, yet another late night entry, although, I've just woken up cos I had a nap.

Went to see Sián in Peterborough yesterday. Beautiful day...until I realised I'd forgotten my bank card...meaning Mr. Hash was unabole to take money out...

We both trotted to the bank:

Me: "Hello, yes, I'd like to withdraw some money from my account, but I've forgotten my bank card"
Old Lady: (Sidenote#1, why do I always get old ladies, it happens everywhere: dinner queues, Sainsers, brothels..(ahem)), anyways....
"Do you have you're bank card?"
"No, I just told you I've not got it"
"Why?"
"Wha? Cos I'm dumb or something"
"Well, do you have your chequebook?"
"Why would I have that?"
"To pay for things by cheque"
(Sián starts laughing. This is offputting)
"No,. No I don't, is there a way I can get money out without them"
"If you know your security question"
Me Thinking: Uh-Oh, I haven't had to think of this since I was 12.

Anyway, this went on ad fucking nauseum, until she gave me the money. Honestly, I should have gone in there with a sawn-off, that would have shut her up.

Cinemas in Peterborough are non-existant by the way. So Sián drove us back to Leicester (where she lives) and we went to see Shrek there instead...which was very very good. Then we talked for a while, and that was nice.

It seems as though I have three different lives sometimes. Uni, Norwich and work. I'm reluctant to merge two or all three together. Although I'd make an exception for certain things, like getting Rob and Matt to play football with people from Sixth Form, for example.

Yes, Yesterday was a good day. In fact, it was a damn good day.

It's just occurred to me that because the Doc has left, this diary is now pretty much mod-free. So, in which case......nah, I'll save that suicide mission for when I quit this......again.

Expert level on Minesweeper is more irriating than piles. (Sidenote #2, I don't have piles. Honest *cough cough*).

Anyway, this entry was brought to you by Hash finding as many versions of "Hallelujah" as he can (Jeff Buckley, Rufus Wainwright and Leonard Cohen so far), listening to Goldfrapp, and Trebor Strong Mints. Love 'em.

I'm Janice Stapleton, This Is BBC Radio Shropshire
Hash
I'll Be Surprised
- Thursday, August 05, 2004 at 20:42:36 (EDT)

Ah....the joys of late night updating. Am currently listening to the weirdo that is John Peel, where he finds most of his crazy shit is anyones guess.

Anyways, work tonight was fun. Salad Bar (complete with eccentric 54 year old Max [old....acquaintance of Mrs. Drury]) gave us the chocolate sauce, us being me and the big lump of funny stuff that is Mr. James. We did shots of it. Not a good idea, kids. Just kinda sticks to your lungs. James was hacking by shot 2, and I had to serve a customer whilst choking to death on the stuff. Heavy shit.

Currently, talking to Lakesie and Sián about football and losing mobile phones. All good stuff.

Couple of corrections:

When I'm talking bout Rob, I meant to say thatI can't offer the dude sex, but that I wish he'd actually talk to me more, hell, I'm just not used to idea of him having a girlfriend, just better get used to it, I guess.

Erm, only the one correction then...

Normal quality of entry will resume soon...this one is just me spouting random shite.

Everybody wants to Getaway - The Music - New album out soon!
Hash
A Brave New World
- Tuesday, August 03, 2004 at 19:38:26 (EDT)

In A U-Turn of cataclysmic proportions, I've decided to redo this thing as I was in the Bell with James and Matt,from Sainsers, and I saw well, some people from Sixth Form who told me that they'd like my web thing back up. So here you go.

What have I been up to?

Off the top of me head.........

Bought a triangle off Ebay
Debating whether to go to Ireland for a bit
Spending ever-increasing amounts of time on the interweb
Meeting up with Sian on Wednesday :D
Other random bobbins

AND PASSING MY FIRST YEAR!

Yeah, you heard that right! Passed everything, although one module was a very close shave mahonda (Irish Culchie slang for "really"). But hell, I'm through, without any special circumstances and next year is gonna rock like a big, dancing gibbon.

Sainsers inexpicably took me back. God knows why. Maybe it's my relaxed customer manner, or the fact that I have naked pictures of the boss (wide-lense only). Hehe. It's neither. I asked, they said yes. Fantastic. Missed everyone from work, in hindsight, particularly James and Matt. Rob has a girlfriend and less time now, hell, I can't offer him sex, but it's ok.

Thats All I Got.

This entry was bought to you by Tesco's Chicken Nuggets (Hmm,chicken,), talking to Sian on MSN and Train - Drops Of Jupiter

Guns Don't Kill People, Rappers Do!
Call Me The Police, WOO WOO WOO!

Goldie Lookin Chain - From South Wales. Safe? You Knows It.
Hash
Back By Impromptu Demand
- Monday, August 02, 2004 at 18:48:53 (EDT)

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Quote:
The recording runs as follows -
Ron: "What in heaven's name was f***ing Ranieri thinking in bringing
Veron on?" Second, unidentified voice: "He'll get savaged by the
press.." Ron [in an increasingly animated voice]: "Oh and f***ing
rightly so. "And I'm sorry, but I f***ing think that f***ing Desailly is
a cheating f***. That was wrong." [Noise from crowd and interference
momentarily obscures Ron's voice...] "He's f***ing been gone for two and
a half years! And instead of playing like an old man and saying 'alright
I'll f***ing stay where I can't get exploited'... "I've always thought
that he has no awareness of danger. "He is what is known in some schools as a f***ing lazy thick ni**er." [Still Ron, but now shouting] "That is a f***ing disgusting performance. "Full marks to them though. They were f***ing different class."

Now WTF is that all about you say? Well, that would be one man losing his job and perhaps this man about to get a yellow card. Ron Atkinson. Yep, the orange legend himself, literally gave it the full gun and has ended up getting the curly finger from the gaffer.

I quite like the guy and whilst I could make a big entry about political f'ing correctness, I can't be bothered.

In fact, this is the last entry. I feel as though Sixth Form is way back in the distance now....and Swansea, well, it feels like home.

Laters, ye,
Hash
HJ5
- Thursday, April 22, 2004 at 20:44:57 (EDT)

Currently listening to Talksport, which is cool, in my bedroom in NOrwich. Yep, I've been back for a week, and sport and music seems to be the order of the day so far.

Played football with Smit, Will, Stu and someother people and was quietly pleased with how much better I've got, in that the ball actually goes where I want it to now. Hehe.

I feel a lot more chilled now, I think about my dad every day, and even though thaat sounds like something that comes out of a handbook, it is true.

Rob is going away on Saturday, to the Dominican Republic as part of his year out. Damn. Why can't he go when I've fecked off back to Swansea? I'm gonna miss him cos he is a damn god bloke... was playing pool with him today, when I got asked for ID...FFS! It was the first time in a long time, and all I bought was a lemonade and a coke! Bloody hell, makes me laugh when I think about it.

Anyway, I'm back now, for three weeks, so if anyone wants to meet up, you've got my address somewhere.

Unless I Have An Outlet of Tescos in my living room, Geographical movement Is required.
Hash
Been A While
- Monday, March 29, 2004 at 19:36:00 (EST)

WAR! YEAH! WHAT IS IT GOOD FOR? ABSOLUTELY NOTHING!

Yes, house 106 is at war with the enemy. 9 of this enemy were taken out last night. The enemy in this case, is ants. Bastards the lot of them. Steff decided to try and get them with a trap. This trap consisted of gaffer tape, marmalade, insulation tape, and a flask of weak lemon drink. (Anyone else remember Fist of Fun?). Well, anyway, we got 9 of the bastards and tonight, we're going to nuke the kitchen floor with bleach.

End of term is Saturday, getting the same train back as Alison and Pete. Should be fun...in completely objective reflection, those two are the housemates I enjoy talking to/generally living with the most. No knock on any others though.

Anyway, Steff just got back, so I'm going to get a hoover....and for anyone that has been on the house website, its not for that purpose.

"Transmit on all known frequencies....including Welsh"
Hash
Back on Saturday
- Tuesday, March 16, 2004 at 10:19:38 (EST)

If you had 18 days being made to fuck all, would you bother doing anything? Oh wait, you're Sixth Formers, hehe, I'm only messing with you. Basically, I have 18 days between my last exam and the end of my (p)residency in Hendrefoelan. I don't know what I'll do in that time, but I'll probably go home or something.

Alan and Emma have been, erm, getting (it) on well for the past few days, Alan seems stubbornly offhand about it, prefering to watch Friends instead of spending time with her, for example. I mean, here we have a man who should, by rights be in Morriston Hospital, but no, he survived Emmas' boyfriend coming down, from North Wales.....

Anyway, we think he spent the night round hers, so me, Pete, Steff and Rhys put up a load of plastic bags and filled, just one of them with water....then I have a load of shaving foam left, cos I'm lazy and can't be bothered to shave, and put it in amongst the bags. I don't think he's very happy. Ah well, he deserves it....

Whats the difference between Manchester United and Leicester City?
Leicester still have players in Europe....

Who Needs Enemies, When You Got Me?
Hash

18 Days Of Freedom.....
- Friday, March 12, 2004 at 09:36:39 (EST)

The subject line explains a weird series of events that started on Friday night:

Alan pulled!!!! Yeah, hold that front page! Alan pulled! And it wasn't Pete!

Anyway, she came back, and whilst Alan was in the bathroom fluffing himself (or slipping into something more comfortable [a condom, perhaps?]) the girl he was with asked, in Welsh: "Bydd Alan ddin yn trin fi fel hwren, bydd e?" I'm not going to translate that, and I think the Doc will know what that means, and I thought that it was a very very weird question to ask. In answer to the question, I don't think he did, but heres the good bit.

The girl he went home with, and went to see on Saturday and Sunday night, who for the sake of argument, we'll call Emma, has a boyfriend.

Who's 32, and drives a truck.

LET THE FUN BEGIN!

Oh, hes coming down on Tuesday.....WHERE ARE THOSE CLOWNS!!! I ASKED FOR CLOWNS IN THIS PARTY DAMMIT!

Alan Brownlie: Dead man walking on the Green Mile

Did I mention that the psycho, North Wales (sorry Doc) lorry driver wasn't best pleased when she told him.....

Anyway, the point of this is twofold: One: It may prove that there is hope for us all, and two: The prosecution rests, in the case of there being no, absolutely no justice on this there earth. I mean Alan!!! I was showing a picture of my flatmates to my mate Shea, and he said: "Whos the forty year old in the middle?" referring to Alan. It's the perfect definition actually....

On a related note, things in the house have been a lot better recently, not been much piss-taking (mainly cos we've been ripping it out of Alan, royally) but it has been relaxed here........its not bad here.....in fact, recently, its been good....

Am looking forward to playing a months worth of decent, on grass football with people that actually know how to kick a ball, although, I'm guessing Alan had other things on his.........mind.

And Danny Fisher has updated his diary..........good lad. Am currently reminiscing about Kett and various people.....indifferent days, I guess.

I Know Tricks That You Can Only Dream Of, It Must Be Your Lucky Day!
Hash

Alan Brownlie: International Pornstar
- Sunday, March 07, 2004 at 19:26:49 (EST)

We have our fifth housemate.....the Franco Begbie wannabe/lookalike, and perenially skint Rhys! Nah, he's a good lad, is Rhys.

Intimate confession time: I am an evil, evil bastard.

Heres' the why: Peter Sales was quite set on moving in with us, but, Steff, AlanPete and myself all agreed that we had to be unanimous about it, even if one person disagreed with the choice of housemate, they wouldn't be joining us. Well, in the case of Peter S., we weren't unanimous. All I'll say is that 3 agreed, and one didn't, that wasn't me though, not that that eases my conscience any more....

Because, I had to tell him. Now, I thought I was doing this the "right" way: You know, telling him in his room, face-to-face, no bullshit, straight up.... I feel horrible and will do for the next six months or so. As for the random applicant...Hannah, she was erm, alternative, and David, her boyfriend, had a chainsaw fetish. So we'll take Begbie ta very much.

Got 66% in a sample essay about privatisation. This goes with my 62% and my 68% gained previous. Good stuff.

Will get fried tomorrow about not gaining enough questionnaires to work on. Ah, fuck em. I can't see it being something to moan about constantly, but then, I wouldn't. Think I'll hide under my rock tomorrow.

Couple of sample jokes: Me, Rhys and AlanPete were playing table football (Geographers 2 vs Economists 0) when Rhys came out with: "Petes like a tiger waiting to pounce" and Pete corrected him with: "No, I'm like a ponce waiting for a tiger". Absolute quality stuff and there was another one, but I can't remember it. Oh well.

I Went To The Store To Get More FIRE To Start The War
Hash
We Have A Winner!
- Thursday, March 04, 2004 at 20:12:04 (EST)

Song lyrics from the Yeah Yeah Yeahs...Karen O's voice is damn good.

3 weeks to go before I'm back, and before you ask I ain't the only insomniac, have a promise from the legend known as Danny Fisher that hes gonna update his diary....yet another man converted.

Hmm...should I say it? Ah, why the hell not. I got 84% on a coursework. It's only 10% overall, but the more bored ones among you will note that its 8.4% overall. Good stuff.

Happy birthday to Sir Rob on Thursday, as I was reminded by Matt tonight, wish I was back in Norwich for it, ah well.... will have to see him a lot, before he goes off his Henry Kissenger thing in Dominica. Start a war man!

Things this week....

1) Have an essay to do
2) Get those questionnaires done
3) James letter from god knows when
4) Ebay shit
5) Get Wilma/Smit to do their diaries

In other news, I have to phone the N&N to get an operation cancelled. I hate that fuckin hospital. It was where me dad died. I went back there some time after that and was sick a good few times. I honestly don't think I can go into a hosptial again. In fact, I'm not going to, I can carry on with pain, it don't hurt that much anyway. And yes, I know I'm being stupid.

Ah, Lalloo-Pip, the cat seems odd. My sisters web thing (and no, I'm not going to link it as she'll kill me) is describing it and its well funny....crazy cat.

Just got a text of Danny Fisher, saying AOL disconnected him, so he probably hasn't updated his diary. Ah well, he will....they always do. They always do.

Here it comes
Here it comes
Here it comes la breeze will blow away
All your reasons and your sense
Spend a little mind
So do your best to run away,
But take a breath and you will pay
You cannot hide
Theres no place to hide
Here it comes
Here it comes....

Simian - Here it comes

The Award For Most Original Salad Display Goes To... Matt Anderson
Hash
Date With The Night
- Monday, March 01, 2004 at 20:40:43 (EST)

Back at the ranch in Norwich, we've bought a cat...me mum was saying that she felt lonely so we got a cat from the shelter.....bet you he runs the fuck away when he sees me in a few weeks.

Apologies to the Doc for not being able to meet up over the week... will have to meet up over Easter....

These entries are getting shorter and shorter. I will update with life in Swansea but for now, this is all I got, except buy Cooper Temple Clause, cos they rock.

Oh, Steff was telling me how, when an employer was faced with loads of job applications, they would pile them all up and then pull out a random pile from that and throw them away, citing: "we don't want to employ anyone unlucky". I thought that was pretty funny....maybe its the way they tell 'em.

I asked her if there was a problem
She said of course there is,
You're still alive she said
I asked do I deserve to be
Is that the question
And if so
If So
Who Answers?
Who answers?
I-Ohhhhh, I'm Still Alive!

Alive - Pearl Jam

Is That The Question?
Hash
We Got A Cat?
- Sunday, February 29, 2004 at 17:41:21 (EST)

See, I was on me PC, reading the graffiti wall (no, don't worry, this isn't another pasted rant) when I turmned my head and actually read the back of my contact lens box.

"IMPORTANT: DO NOT CHANGE FROM THE SOLUTIONS RECOMENDED BY YOUR CONTACT LENS PRACTICIONER"

That, and a hell load of other stuff has made me realise how much we actually lsten to authority......you know, "collect your coursework from room 207", "do not exceed stated dose", and my personal, all-time favourite: "Do not take internally". Just thought I'd mention this, and I'm tired.

Currently talking to Matt, whos pissed of with my MSN name of "bringing me immortality, falling down one thousand feet", I've changed it now....dammit Matt.

This really wasn't an entry, more of an observation.....to my flatmates, I'll be back, possibly on Monday.

New Fangled Shorthand Shit
Hash
Without Warning.......
- Tuesday, February 24, 2004 at 19:07:25 (EST)

.......I'm back in Norwich, lecturer strikes andgeneral need a break syndrome have meant that I'm writing this from my PC, in my room, back in little old Blithewood Gardens. Fantastic.

Anyway, plans for the week are...

Going into school to bother Mr. Allerhand and the Doc.
Telling Scumberrys when I'm back (21 March)
Seeing the people from Scumberrys, like Rob, Matt, James etc.
Buying the King of Leon album, which I've been meaning to do for ages.

Anyway, thats about it, I hate my PC, in hindsight, mainly cos its slow, but hell, it does the job.

WARNING: PROJECT MANAGEMENT SUCKS MORE (USE IMAGINATION) THAN DAVE COLLINS.
Don't know who he is, or whether he does, but its a random piece of graffiti from a lecture room desk.

Guess Who's Back
Hash
For One Week Only
- Monday, February 23, 2004 at 18:26:44 (EST)

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
S(na)Wof T:
The media does not run the country; they are strictly regulated effecting what is revealed. Independent corporations are often linked or suppressed by governmental or judicial pressures. Example the Hutton inquiry. Media institutions are also prohibited by their 'Code of conducts'. Therefore meaning they are restricted in what they say. They may often distort the truth and edit the events of the world, but whether they are to be believed, depends on how naive their audience is. It is wrong of you to believe the media runs the country.
Cancer was an example of where funding should go.
I'm sure most other footballers should donate some of their bulky pay packets to charitable needs. For example schools, so people, like themselves can be educated.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Networker:
Football is a national treasure. Although England may not be great at it, it creates a sense of community. The sportsmen AND women (yes, women too) do get overpaid, but thanks to the government, they get a fair bit cut off for taxes. Then, think about the sportspeople in less fortunate countries who get paid barely anything to do the same amount of work. You portray yourself as righteous, but you didn't think about the less developed countries, did you? No.

So what do you aim for in life? You have criticised others, but what are your aspirations?

S(na)Wof T:
My aspiration is to of course, make a mark upon the world; whether it, be politically or academically.

+++++++++

More possibly copyrighted stuff from the Graffitti Wall. I'll answer each in turn.

1) "It is wrong of you to believe the media runs the country." I'm still convinced that it does. Codes of conduct mean literally nothing to the media if they can sell more newspapers. Sensationalist, exaggerative journalism, just creates hype which people buy into....an example? Big Brother. I mean, look at the concept: Take x people, put them in a hous eand watch them....ok.....

2) "I'm sure most other footballers should donate some of their bulky pay packets to charitable needs. For example schools, so people, like themselves can be educated."

Not every footballer gets paid thousands a week. Footballers, even as high as Division 1 get paid in less than what they could recieve. I know this point is going to be pedantic, but the problem can again be blamed on the media. The last TV deal for the Premiership was over £1bn!! Clubs pay players because they can (unless you're Leeds) and if they don't, another club will. Prize money in the Premiership varies on about half a million each place, so there is a lot of...emphasis on competition.

And on another point, why should footballers donate their money to schools? Didn't you call them "useless, unintelligent 'men'"? Why would they give something back to a system which they didn't use to their full potential or that didn't help them to their potential?

"Then, think about the sportspeople in less fortunate countries who get paid barely anything to do the same amount of work. You portray yourself as righteous, but you didn't think about the less developed countries, did you?"

So says the networker. I have nothing to add to that, except I didn't consider other countries either. Actually, I will add that, sport is a way for people in LEDC's to get noticed and get a move to a bigger club. Recent examples....Obafemi Martins at Inter Milan. Andre D'Alessandro got to escape from Argentinas financial crisis to play for Wolfsberg in Germany.

Hell, I have nothing to add except to say buy the new Rock Sound mag, comes with a free CD which has a song called "Black Egg" by Orange Goblin, absolute mint stuff.

Oh, and why did I write this on here, and not the graffitti wall? Cos, I erm, did I guess......can't be arsed to copy and paste stuff over again. Bugger it,I'm gonna watch some overpaid, unintelligent men kick an inflated bag of wind across a field.

Some (not all) words of truth: Get some perspective. Football employs shitloads of people, and these "unintelligent men" would be likely to have a job?? Hundreds of thousands of people watch it every week. Millions watch it on the television. Have you ever played football?

And one last thing I meant to say earlier. BNP???? Perhaps in the seventies that used to happen, but in Norwich, Leicester, West Ham and other clubs (I use them as examples cos they're the only grounds I've been to) I've never seen it. People get ejected for racism, it simply doesn't exist in the domestic game. Abroad is different. The BNP attempt to hijack England away trips, possibly in the same way that the socialists attempt to hijack top-up fees demos.

And also, because public debate scares me, and that I don't have much time, if you want to continue the debate, either, repost on the graffiti wall or email me on hashimpiperdy@Hotmail.com

Like A Thorn In Your Side
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The Graffiti Wall
- Saturday, February 21, 2004 at 07:41:57 (EST)

Football is a waste of space and it encourages members of the British National Party to unleash their racist nationalism among the world. It also creates an unfair system, where useless unintelligent 'men' can become rich. Who achieve nothing more than kicking a ball, "My God, they could save the world!"- Yeah right. They are also immoral, in the fact that they idolise themselves and incorporate unhealthy and luxury products. Which are not necessary to live a decent life. Funding should be put into more worthy projects, like research into cancer or charities.
Now for the lesson of the week children- Academics, scientist and politicians are the ones who change and run the country. So, now would be a good time to change your aspirations. At least aim to make a useful mark upon the world.

So says the graffitti wall. Just saw that on there, and posted my response as:

I also think you're a *******, and I can't see where the rugby players come into it, but, not all footballers are "immoral" and "idolise themselves". John O'Shea works part-time in Africa with the GOAL foundation. Tim Sherwood donated his wages for a year to the Twin Towers foundation, there are many other cases. I'm going to bet you read the Daily Mail or some such muck. Yeah, funding should be put into charities, but which ones? If you give money to one, you give it to all of them, why just cancer? Why not heart disease or Alzheimers (sp?) A sweeping statement like yours completely disvalues your argument.

"Academics, scientist and politicians are the ones who change and run the country" Again, nope. The media run the country. They have the platform, and they choose who can speak upon it.

Like your ending though.

++++++++++

FFS, I'm too tired to go into it further, but I will if I can be bothered. To whoever wrote it.... what made you want to post it?

And Bonner has gone 165 minutes of these championships without conceding a goal....Oh Dangerhere!!
Hash

PS: I know it was 2 updates in one night, on two very very diverse topics, but saw the graffitti wall after writing on here about me dad, and got pissed off with people constantly slagging off football. Where do the BNP come into it anyway? FFS
AUTS...FFS and the Daily Mail
- Thursday, February 19, 2004 at 18:40:23 (EST)

THIS ENTRY IS GOING TO BE SLIGHTLY SOBERING
CURRENTLY LISTENING TO: BRMC: IN LIKE THE ROSE

Today is the first day in the rest of my life....part 23.

The above is my new found commitment to get some work done. Why? Well, I was tidying my room earlier, emptying drawers and stuff...when I found... an old bank statement. And on the back of this envelope, was a note from my dad, dated from October.... I'm debating whether to write it up on here...

Reading it, I should have noticed a few things....

A) He always used (past tense - still weird) proper paper, never scribbled noted on bank statements
B) Spelling mistakes.... he never had them either
C) The amount of fuckin pride he had for me....

The last one is brilliant. He wrote: "it is with the greatest pride I say that you are my son".

It's a really nice piece of writing, but the last line stands out...."All being well I shall see you 12/12/03 if not before". Well, he never made it to that day, but I'm so glad I went home early, if I hadn't, I probably wouldn't be writing this right now.

I'm not sure if this is the right place to write this, but hell, I have anyway.

Hey Dad, I'm still here, I know you are too
Hash
Today is the first day.....
- Thursday, February 19, 2004 at 18:19:20 (EST)

Currently Listening to the voices in my head

Got back from the student bar, watching Wales, Scotland and England. England were poor again...as usual....

Wales were damn good, Earnshaw hattrick etc.

Sprowstons' claim to fame (sic) Danny Mills came on for England in the second half, and someone next to me started shouting...."HE'S A SPROWSTON BOY ISN'T HE?! A FUCKING SPROWSTON BOY. THATS ALL YOU EVER HEAR. A SPROWSTON BOY". So me, feeling brave, asked him how he knew this, and he replied, "I'm from Brundall, but used to live in Heartsease." Now in the spirit of Kett unity, I'm not going to say part of my response, but I replied with "Yeah, and I'm from fucking Sprowston too". And because I was wearing something that didn't make me look gay, or worse, like Alan, he apologised....I told him that I thought Mills is the worst player ever to play for England (Carlton Palmer excluded).

Actually, this entry was going to be a load of invective about the deviant known as Matt, but I can't be arsed right now. Also, I think he's complimented me on his web diary, but I'd like to say I ain't responsible for the content of external sites, may help reduce your weight as part of a calorie-controlled diet etc., oh, and we played football for three hours today. And we all rocked. Proper stuff.

I'm off.

You know the devil and me, we're both so very cold
You said your body was young, but your mind was very old
You're comin on strong and I like the way,
The visions fade out and fade away
You're part of the life I've never had,
I tell you man, it's just ok
I tell you man, it's just ok

Chemical Brothers - Setting Sun

Revolution, the only solution!
Hash

England, Wales, and Matt!?
- Wednesday, February 18, 2004 at 19:49:51 (EST)

In September, when we move house, we need a fifth housemate, as has been previously advertised. We have one definite,a nd one possible candidate for this. Rhys, who I'm sure was Franco Begbie from Trainspotting in a previous life (Economics) and Peter Sales (Geographer, only less annoying). Dilemmas are fucking difficult. Not that I get much of a say as to who, I'm not so bothered really.

Ebay addiction is back in force. I never thought to type "Leicester City" into Ebay search and it comes back with all sorts of useless stuff.

I'm so bored. I got a bit of time to kill before I go to my Philosophy lectue, where I don't know anyone. Bastards.

Anyway, just wanted to say: Harris Beddows-Wilkinson, you are a very sick man :D, regarding Sunday anyway.

Oh, coming soon, I'm going to write these up in word, so hopefully I can get some sort of formatting thing going.

Here comes something wonderful
So don't let them throw it away
Cos they know nothing anyway
Words
They mean nothing, so you can't hurt me

Doves - Words

You Have Been Outbid, Again
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House Moving
- Wednesday, February 18, 2004 at 06:19:58 (EST)

Currently listening to: AFI - Celluoid Dream and Yeah Yeah Yeahs - Maps

Housemate wanted:

To be living with four other second year blokes in the Brynmill area.

We're housetrained (cept Pete). Rent, £42pw.

Phone Steff on ..................

Now, with an advert like that, who WOULDN'T wanna live with us?

Oh, because I'm dumb, Matts web diary is at www.livejournal.com/users/beardedsolitude - I think that might be a reference to Rory Gallagher. A damn good musician.

In other news, our network is up and running. As is the football table. Pete went unbeaten yesterday, and I didn't win a game....not even against Hannah.

Everything is speeding up. And I don't like it. Not one bit.

Damn it.
Damn it all to Hell
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The Library and Bank Transfers
- Tuesday, February 17, 2004 at 09:22:24 (EST)

Guess I should ask for permission but...

valentines i guess
As it's the hot topic of the week i'll add my tuppence worth.

Cards sent;0
Cards received;0 That's karma.
The thing is it's a load bollocks isn't. I meaan really. What the hell kind of good is going to come from sending an anonymous card to some bint that blatently has no interest in you'r ugly mug. Or for that matter receiving one. Now, I don't want to get on my 'Christmas is a load of comercial claptrap' highh-horse, but Valentines is a load of commercial claptrap.
What did the victorians do for us? They took a nice idea, the sending of pleasantly decocorated seasonal salutions on Gods birthday and, fair play to them, saw the lucre and our birthdays got a slice of the action. Then they conned us. They invented all these other bloody days; Mother's day,Father's day, Ascention day, 14th after pentacost.... and we. the British public, fell for it. Somehow the idea of spending an evening in a packed 2nd rate Pizzaria with 1700 clones, gazing across theuquet of an overpriced wilting rose into the testosterone glazed eyes of a squiffy suiter is romantic. Doesn't make you reach for tissue, and Razzle.
Anyway, I'm not bitter or owt.
Maybe we should get a day for us singletons. Liberace Day?

Me? The 14 son Ander. In the sack? With a lady? With my reputation?

What did I do Valentines Day? I spent it in the student bar, with a load of, and I love this word now. Gluebags, GLUEBAGS to a man, and woman. I like Matts idea better though. Dammit, I need to stop feeling alone...

Get me a girlfriend!! I'm going crazy...

Good evening, Mr Anderson,
Hash
Addendum: Matts Diary
- Monday, February 16, 2004 at 17:26:58 (EST)

As the summary line suggests, a damn good weekend. Got me laundry done, and got our accomodation sorted out for next year. I'm writing the address for me own benefit...

36 Waterloo Place
Swansea

Doesn't really have the same ring as Hendrefoelan Student Village, or for that note Blithewood Gardens, but it'll do. If anyone (and I severely doubt this) has applied to Swansea and wants to live outside the village, we have a spare room and are on the hunt for a fifth housemate... applications to the usual address.

In other news, El-Gropo, Matt, has a web diary. Got an email with the link on it, and realised how much I miss the guy. Except his groping. I mean, its quite difficult at uni to find someone who has the same taste in music as me. And Matt, Rob and James were, and that helped. Legends in their own right.

Thanks to the Doc for getting me Mr. Allerhands e-mail, will be bothering him soon.

Anyway, just a quick update. Useless trivia question: Why is Germanys away kit green? Blagging rights to anyone who knows.

Flying, Falling, Landing, Dying
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A Very Productive Weekend
- Monday, February 16, 2004 at 17:20:19 (EST)

It was Valentines Day. Yep, the day that everyone checks their letterboxes to see if someone could be bothered to sen them a card, supposedly anonymous, yet postmarks etc. make it as transparent as a bag full of windows.

Well fuck that.

I sent a text message, but she ain't replied yet. I don't think she reads this either so I'm safe for now.... not that I have a chance with her anyway. Damn nice people....damn having to try.... damn long-distances ah well.

Steff, Pete and myself went househunting today for next year. Alan (who I've taken to calling the gimp [have you read the last entry yet, fuckwit?]) is away in Bristol. Anyways, househunting, had a look at a couple of houses, after making phone calls. I felt like I was making my prank phone calls like I used to when I got bored, only these had a purpose. Went round and looked, one very nice house, one house that might have been a shrine to marijuana, you could smell the stuff everywhere. Anyway, the nice house, phoned up, were told that it had already gone.... dammit. Anyway, we're looking at one tomorrow. Could be good, could be bad.

Got home, pissed about on Champ for a while, and texted Becca. Talked to her on the phone for a while, was nice...

And that was my day.

Which was nice.

In the last entry I wrote something about everything that happened before my dad dying seems so distant... it does. Still. Life sucks at the moment, theres a few things that could make it better, but at the risk of leaving my self open for a broadside from anyone, I'll leave it there.

Which One Has More Va-Va-Voom?
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Househunting and other Irrelevant Stuff
- Saturday, February 14, 2004 at 19:51:57 (EST)

The Summary line lies. Lies three times. A) It ain't English, B) it ain't summer and c) it ain't rain. The weather today was great, warm and sunny. So warm and sunny in fact that we played football, for about 2 and a half hours. My legs hurt. Grr.

In other, more important news, my dad died 2 months ago....everything seems so faraway and distant, as if everything that happened before then, never happened at all...I'm sounding weird... I know what I want to say, but it's difficult to express. Ah well.

In very very unimportant news, I wish my flatmates would stop reading this. Every so often at a quiet moment, Alan will do that annoying smile of his, and quote something from the diary, in that annoying fucking way of his. I'm ranting again. Like early on Tuesday morning, he texted me with "Go and get the hoover". In exactly those words, I was in a lecture at the time, and texted him back with something like do you not know what please is, and that I was in a lecture. He came back with "Me and Pete thought you were asleep". Yes, as i keep saying to them, I missed a lot of lectures towards the end of last term, but I reckon I had a damn good reason for doing so. Tell you what, Alan, why don't you go hundreds of miles away and get told that you're dad is ill, possibly dying. You reckon you're gonna be able to sleep much then?

I've written this on here, cos I know he reads it, fuckin grow up.

Hash
English Summer Rain
- Wednesday, February 11, 2004 at 15:52:40 (EST)

Okay, I'm not pissed off, if anyone is reading the summary line - its just the name of the song I was listening to.

Just a quick update. Noticed that the time of this will come up 5 hours before GMT, because its in Eastern Time. Just thought I'd make that clear. Yep.

Eastern Time?
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Blow Up The Outside World
- Monday, February 09, 2004 at 17:39:32 (EST)

Damn, I can't think of a way to start this entry, as relaxed as I am feeling.

Had a good long talk with Dr E. on Sunday, via MSN. Was very cool. Since that talk, I've been feeling quite relaxed.

Regular readers of this (all 4 of them) will know I have no lectures until 4 o'clock on a Monday. The reason why I'm awake on a Monday is because I've been meeting the people in our group.... including Ian. To be honest, when I got the email saying who was in our group, and seeing someone called Dave in there, I was wishing Dave wouldn't turn up, not because I dislike the guy, hes actually pretty cool, but because it would give me an excuse to email the professor with the line "Daves not here, man." I have no idea what thats from, or why it makes me laugh, it just does.

In other news, the blokes virginity is now £155 if anyones interested. Co-incidentally, Pete is saying things about spending a lot of money. Hmm.

Ah well, 2 hours to kill.....can't really be bothered to go home. I'll stay right here.

From So High, We Seem So Small,
Hash
La La La La La
- Monday, February 09, 2004 at 08:58:18 (EST)

The following block of text was found by me and Pete on ebay. Its £12 if anyones interested. I think Pete is the highest bidder.

I am 34 years old and I am still a virgin. Yes, you read that right. You may have heard about the young lady who offered her virginity on ebay for £10,000. Well I saw that and thought 'I can beat that'. For as little as £10, ladies, you can have the privilege of deflowering me and unburdening me of this huge weight on my shoulders (not to mention elsewhere). I have to lose my cherry before rigor mortis sets in on my private parts. It's either that or my mother will introduce me to someone from her prayer group. Friends (who also persuaded me to do this) tell me it's all about 'confidence'. Well my confidence is non-existent after two decades of rejection. That means I never attract any women which means I am not confident which means I don't attract any women. Bit of a catch 22, I think you'll agree. So basically I need to finally get this monkey off my back in order to boost my non-existent social confidence and get on with my life. I am not a freak or a secret serial killer, I am reasonably slim, able bodied, not bad looking (so I'm told, usually by a girl who 'really likes me as a friend, but not in 'that' way'), university educated, living in North London, no diseases or deformities, or major vices (apart from the odd pint - I don't even smoke) I work in the public sector, get on well with women, except none of them have ever wanted to sleep with me, they just want to be friends. I'm not the most outgoing of people, I'll grant you, but I am not that boring once you get to know me. I've been daft enough to put this advert up for a start and risk public ridicule, so I can't be that dull... So what d'you reckon girls? £10 is a hell of a cheap date. I have condoms (I renew them every few months in the vain hope of getting lucky). I will respect you in the morning, I promise not to leave the toilet seat up, I won't fart in bed and I won't stalk you in the deluded belief that we are destined to spend the rest of our lives together. Even if you don't fancy it, post a bid anyway, it'll make me feel better to see my 'value' as a human commodity rising. Thankyou for your time.

Pete and myself are tempted to email him asking if he offers refunds.

Yes, we were bored. And anyway, I asked him to help me cure the addiction so we spent an hour looking for stuff on Ebay. Well, when I say stuff, its probably best that I don't go into specifics.

I'll Buy That For A Dollar!
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Would You Buy it?
- Saturday, February 07, 2004 at 19:17:46 (EST)

I feel as though my legs have been replaced with lead piping.....

I had basketball trials tonight and the coach said 20 laps of the court as a "warm up". Now, I haven't played since the not very well-documented arse kickings Shea used to dole out on a regular basis. I scored a basket and wasn't that bad, but I was the smallest person there. I WAS THE SMALLEST PERSON THERE! WTF!?

Currently listening to Audioslave as I can't be bothered to switch the playlist... why couldn't I get housemates like Peter Sales (another geographer) and Rhys (non A-Level economist, who likes the same music as me). Instead I got Alan and Pete, who aren't bad people, but can get a bit too much sometimes. I have a feeling Rhys and Peter S. would give you your space if you wanted it (something Steff is good at) whereas Alan and Pete, who shall be henceforth known as AlanPete can get a bit intense.

Right now, I'm talking to Anita and Smit, both about different things. Think I first got to know them both roughly the same time. I remember when I first met Anita, it was in a French lesson, and Becca dragged her over.... the point I'm making is that mutual friends can be cool...if you take the time to know them. Didn't get to see Anita over the holiday, but have promised to over Easter. And now that it's written, it will be done.

I think my calves have dropped off near Parkway roundabout.

Ah, sod it, I'm off....song lyrics....there was a really good one by the Clash, a song called White Riot, but I can't find them right now....ah well. Next time.

I Feel Awake, Lifting Me Off The Ground...Flying....Falling....Landing...Dying
Hash
Ouch
- Thursday, February 05, 2004 at 19:28:54 (EST)

*Drums...................*
*BANG!*
WHOO!
*GUITAR RIFF*
YEAH!

That was a very poor attempt at a song intro - if anyone can guess, I'd be very very impressed.

Things are kinda odd here at the moment. Parts of it feel like High School, whereas others feel like toilet training (Alan??).

Basically, thats a very cryptic message at Alan, who....*DECIDED TO EDIT THIS BIT AS ITS SHOCKING, EVEN FOR HIM* but he'll get over it. I want to use his camera for an advert but I can't write what he did, because its so bad, its funny as hell.

Met the group tossers, who hereon in will no longer be known as the tossers. Angela, I already knew, Tim (the guy with the double-barrelled surname) is actually cool, and has come up with some good ideas, Ian is....well, no-one knows where he is, or who he is, all we know, is he has glasses and facial hair. Dave is pretty cool, met him today and shared some ideas. We decided to do the education question... now to bother Mr. Allerhand.

I was gonna write a UCAS checklist up but couldn't be arsed but I might write something about uni... I guess you shouldn't use this diary as a template of a standard student.

After karaoke yesterday, Alan thought of singing a song called "Bestialitys Best, son, (to the tune of "Tie me Kangaroo down"). He's come up with about 30 of these, one of which is the summary line.

Anyway, next time, I'll write about what is happening with the courses here at Swansea.....Bet you can't wait.....

It's the February Sales: Circumcision: Half Off!
Hash

It was Soundgarden by the way....sorry....I'll get my coat
Down The Throat of a Goat
- Wednesday, February 04, 2004 at 15:51:07 (EST)

I have 10 minutes before Philosophy, so I will probably update this heavily when I get home.

Just want to say

HAPPY BIRTHDAY MUM!!

Quick Entry
- Wednesday, February 04, 2004 at 06:50:24 (EST)

www.addictinggames.com - My record on the helicopter is 2250.
www.theonion.com - Americas finest news source
www.thespark.com - Take the tests!
www.football365.com - Football
www.freewebs.com/37threvolution/ - My website - It's in progress

Thats about it...I need sleep

You say you want a revolution,
Hash
Some More Useful Links....
- Monday, February 02, 2004 at 21:12:34 (EST)

Hmm....how do I feel today?? Tired, certainly, I've just had a nap for an hour. Relaxed? A little, all exams are over. Was doing some crash revision with a desparately hungover Rhys in the library today, was awesome stuff. He was going to do a Franco Begbie (Trainspotting) and shout "FUC*ING BA'HEIDS" very loudly halfway through the exam if he got stuck but he didn't. Ah well, it explains why I was smirking through the whole thing.

Decided not to end this as I got a very cool email from the Doc, which explains the summary line. Just had a nap and thought I'd check my email (unlike virtually everyone else, I don't seem to get junk mail, which is cool) and found a happy birthday message from him. As well as the nice distinction of a fair few unique views of this thing.

I think my head is beginning to understand most things that are happening around me, but everything still feels odd. As for belonging here, I'm still feeling a little.......isolated (?) and Steff may be leaving and coming back next year to start again.... which would mean we'd probably get yet another FUC*IN GEOGRAPHER in..... the place is so overrun by glorified colourung-in students. Grr.

Ah well, life is a little better again, so no need for the song lyrics...

What goes around, just comes around, this is the sound, it's time to get down
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Brighten Up Your Day!
- Monday, February 02, 2004 at 15:54:54 (EST)

As the summary said, I'm 19 now. Thats age, not shoe size, IQ, mental age or dress size. I've just got in from watching the Superbowl and for all those that thought Johnny Wilkinson was good under pressure. You lot need to watch Adam Vinitieri kick and win his team (the Patriots) the Superbowl.

My voice is shot to shit.

Anyway, just thought I'd mention it was my birthday, in case anyone would like to send me a present (used banknotes are good), but I'll settle for an email.

I'm quite tempted to finish this diary now as my flatmates (not roommates Pete) read this now. I have another one stashed away, but no-one knows that because it's quite well disguised. If anyone wants it, send me the email and I'll give you a link back.

Oh yeah, birthday presents were...

an anti-stress ball from Steff
The Matrix on DVD from Alan (I've never seen it)
A Penknife and cookies from Pete
and last but not least.....

A family photo from my sis. You have no idea how much that means to me. My dad is smiling loads in that photo. I hope he can see me and that he's smiling too.

Thanks Faatemah.

Much Against Everyones Advice
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Happy Birthday to Me....Yesterday
- Sunday, February 01, 2004 at 22:48:09 (EST)

http://groups.msn.com/HENDREFOELAN - The house website, I would also like to empahsise the photos with the hoover were posed. You have to join and webmaster Steff will probably accept you.

www.swan.ac.uk - Swansea uni. If anyone is thinking of coming here....Are you hell....

Anyway, thats all I have to say.

An entry with no weirdness today!!
Hash

Links....
- Sunday, January 25, 2004 at 15:46:54 (EST)

WELCOME TO THE START OF TEACHING BLOCK 2

As the line above shows, that is what I will be facing as of tomorrow. It's Saturday night/Sunday morning, but I don't go out then, mainly cos its' shite down the pub.

Teaching Block 2 shouldn't make much difference to me really. I have one new module (Sociological Perspectives) and thats it.

In other news, I'm close to quitting Sainsburys. As is Rob, James, Elen and Matt. And Ros. And every other person under 20 (and Matt, as I said) that works on their counters. Why?? Because Christine is leaving. Christine might be the most Norfolk person (with the exception of Alan Partridge) in, well, Norfolk. Not that that is a bad thing. She gave me a job when she didn't have to and got a shy, cynical, naive 16 year old and she was responsible for me actually enjoying (I guess I can say that when I'm miles away)working there. In return, I turned into a cynical 18 year old, who is still possibly naive. To quote Rob: No more serving time for crimes against chickens.

I realise that this diary is becoming slightly more erratic. But like I say, if anyone would like to spend 20 minutes inside my head, you are welcome and I guarantee you won't last 5.

What else can we write. Ah yes, Rob thought that the entry before the Ben Elton political impression was cool. Which is nice.

Seems odd how everything seems to have neat splits in two in my life. Examples being my dad being alive, and now he isn't. Me being in Swansea, or being in Norwich, me at work, or I'm not. Yet these splits overlap and meld into one. Why can't it just be normal? Ah well, something has to give soon. I dunno what it will be, but just like Teaching Block 2, it has to be something new. I can't keep going on like this, what with all the demotivation.

It has to be something new.

Theres a bit of a delay whilst I try to find the lyrics for the song I'm gonna use. In the meantime....heres some music.....

How'd we get here, at this height?
And whats this talk of deadweight?
I know you always drink,
But we don't always fight,
The landing lights are on,
But we're just out of sight,
Is this thing mobile?
Still wheels,
But I'm not done yet,
So hang on....

Cooper Temple Clause - Blind Pilots

It's Murder on the Dancefloor....
Hash
Blind Pilots
- Saturday, January 24, 2004 at 19:52:46 (EST)

Yes. Yes it is late. But the insomnia won't go...so heres another entry....

WARNING: THE FOLLOWING DIARY ENTRY MAY CONTAIN TRACES OF NUTS AND WILL ALSO BE PROBABLY QUITE POLITICAL

Okay, thats the disclaimer outta the way. I'm (very quietly) listening to Soundgarden - Let Me Drown as it has quite possibly the finest drum-based introduction ever, with the possible exception of Smells Like Teen Spirit (think about it). Oh yeah, forgot. Where the hell is the graffiti wall!? Bloody spam-merchants.

Anyway....

Tony Blair should not be the PM of this country. That statement may now mean that this web diary will be read by all sorts of MI5 suits and other such people. The reasons are, again with my peace-loving, all induced death is wrong viewpoint that Dr. Kelly died. Right? A HUMAN BEING DIED. He died because of pressure from both the BBC and Blair as he was the source for the (in my view) non-existent WMDs'. A death can very easily be made to look like suicide, and it seems to much of a coincidence for a govt. which has everything to lose, so to them, he may have saved Blairs' "presidency".

I remember when he did die. I was working with Rob at scumberrys, when Radio 1 announced it. We both turned to each other and said the same thing: "Conspiracy Theory??"

Blair is unfit to lead this country at his present level. Why?

1) He takes directions from George W. Bush (and don't let me get started on him)
2) He is too scared of the public vote
3) Tuition Fees - Charles Clarke = Tosser
4) His continuing rift with Brown (who should be leader)
5) His lack of EU integration
5.1) Not going into the Euro from the start, meaning the UK's say gradually diminishes.
6) The awesome amount of wastage (number of civil servants trebled in the last 10 years)
7) Underfunded education

Thats all I can be bothered to think about right now. Bloody graffiti wall. That was gonna help me get to sleep!

Anyway, am racking my brains for a political song lyric, but will settle for this.

"When they knock at your door,
How you gonna come?
With your hands on your head,
Or on the trigger of your gun?

The Clash - Guns of Brixton.

Should emphasise that all the above is my view, and not Dr.E. or the schools, yadda yadda yadda. Oh, and that Mr. Rob is a lot better at political stuff than me. Sorry.

You're Ha Ha High, Babe, But You Can't Keep It On The Ground
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Just Read Robs Diary
- Wednesday, January 21, 2004 at 21:17:25 (EST)

As the summary suggests, just seenit, tis a pretty good film, and will write more about it in a moment. But first, a quote....

"And one more thing, if I see one more happy couple come into Sainsburys ona Saturday night, I will make sure we're cooking them, first thing Sunday morning"

That quote was from Mr. Rob's web diary. Pretty much sums up how I feel, only I don't work at Siansburys anymore. Scumbags.

Decided I don't want to write about LOTR, because what I was gonna write would have been very heavy. Heavier than the stuff I normally write in here now.

Was reading the graffiti wall: Wilma: Death can never ever, EVER be justifiable. If everyone saw that, there would be no murders. Someone prove me wrong. Although, I remember once, Mr. Allerhand beleived anything that happened was natures way of restoring a kind of balance. Everything from 9/11 to SARS was natures way of dealing with an imbalance. Theory kinda makes sense, but it would be very difficult to prove it.

My god, I'd love for anyone to spend 20 minutes inside my head. You'd be screaming at 5. Screaming, I tells ya.

Song:

So, go, go, back to your bright lights,
You made promises you couldn't keep
Kicking up fuss, something something
Put your hands up, you got nowhere to go.
We're here to break things
We're here to break things
So forget about everything
Oh, and pass these kisses to blow (I think it says that)

Cooper Temple Clause - Promises Promises

I will write about LOTR and the effect (right word I think) it had on me, except being able to urinate for about 4 and a half minutes, but until the next time the insomnia kicks in, wasn't this the most pointless entry ever?

Long-term Urination, eh?
Hash
Just Seen Lord of The Rings...
- Monday, January 19, 2004 at 20:27:01 (EST)

Hello again. Exciting news from back in Swansea. We might be getting a new housemate. Shes' female whilst you're not asking. Her name is Tia. Steff has kindly volunteered the use of his room. She's friendly enough, came into my room and said hello. I think she'll like Steff more though. Not because of the usual seven tonnes of self-doubt I like to inflict upon myself every day, but because Steff knows her see?

Did I not say before, Tia is Steffs' dog. Did I have you going?? Huh?? Did I? Nah, did I hell. Just thought about it whilst playing CHampionship Manager, like all sad bastard students.

Have been feeling really bored. DOn't have a stock of prank phone calls and even worse, have no numbers to phone when I'm bored either. Sometimes, I feel really isolated from everyone, but when I'm in certain peoples company, I want to be alone, I don't get it. Analyse that, I beleive the term is.

Have nothing to do next week. Well, nothing but meet the other tossers in my group project. LET THE FUN BEGIN! My God (does this have a capital letter?), a choice between terrorism and education. I want to choose education, simply because the lecturer (Dr. Blackaby) is a lot better, and it gives me an excuse to bother Mr. Allerhand. Bet the other fuckers choose terrorism. Bloody democracy.

Is this entry a little aggressive??

Went to look at a prospective place to livbe next year. Would have been without my flatmates (shock), would have been with Angela and one of her mates, a bloke called Rishi. Decided I'm not gonna take the room, nice enough, just haven't felt that isolated in a long time, you know, when you accidentally meet someone elses mates, and they (probably not delibrately) leave you out almost entirely? Please, never let me be like that. And if I have, then sorry.

Every other bloody word seems to be sorry with me now. It feels sometimes as if I'm repenting already. Perhaps I should explain...

What if we all die tomorrow?? Something I've been thinking about for ages is something I heard on a radio show before: What if we had 48 hours left on earth and then everything goes? EVERYTHING. The chaos and anarchy would be awesome, people wouldn't be afraid anymore. Anyone have any regrets? I can imagine what my dad would have done, hell, can only guess what he would have done. I know it would not have been spent in a NHS bed, waiting for the flatline on his heart monitor, waiting for the final moment, before they turn out the lights, and give you the number of a funeral parlour. Let you say your last words and leave gently, back to your house, knowing he won't be there anymore. What would he have wanted to do? Make his peace? He wrote, in the book where he recorded the multitude of tablets he took each day, to delay the inevitable, his last will, made me cry when I read it. I'm not gonna write what was said, but it was moving. He could barely write it, his hands were so weak.

Going back to what I wrote though, if you had 48 hours left, what would you do?? I know what I'd do, and it wouldn't involve looting everything I could. I'd spend about three-quarters of it with my family, and the rest with my mates, but not in that order. For the last half hour, I know what I'd want to do, but I'd be afraid to do it because..... well, if I told you any more, I'd have to kill you. I know what it would be though.

Does this all sound weird??

Perhaps its the music, which incidentally, is a band called, The Music. Basically, the thing I'm trying to write is that we (read I) should stop being horrible and nasty to people and stop making unreasonable demands of others. I don't know how I feel right now. I shouldn't be here. I don't belong here. In amongst people like Alan and Pete. I don't belong. I want to be at home, where there are genuine people, like Rob and Shea. I want to be amongst those sorts of people.

To answer the question: yes Hash, you weirdo, this does sound weird.
Things to look forward to next week:

1) Getting a letter from James
2) Househunting
3) Meeting the group tossers
4) Playing unfeasably large amounts of 9-ball
5) 2 Weeks to Superbowl!!

Now class, listen closely as the pointless song lyrics are about to be delivered unto thee...

Went down a central reservation in last nights' red dress,
Could still smell you on my fingers and taste you on my breath
Steppin through a brilliant shade, underneath a bridge
This time, this time, this time,
It's fine, just as it is

Beth Orton - Central Reservation

That was a longish entry. I think its' best to end it there

This time, this time, this time.
Hash
Turn Out The Light.....
- Sunday, January 18, 2004 at 19:41:45 (EST)

Back in Swansea, nothing was stolen, although the doors were completely screwed.

I feel a lot different. I'm actually getting used to the persaonalities of Alan and Pete. Random quot. Just after we had our tea on Saturday evening, me and Steff were just talking when Pete suddenly popped up with: "How do you bugger a giraffe". WTF??

Anyway, got to see the police soon. Was thinking, I wouldn't mind being part of the police force... any job I do from now on (Scumberys don't count) has to involve helping other people, like the civil service or something. Dammit Rob. when does the world domination happen??

Exam on Wednesday.... Principles of Economics, should be fine.... just revise elasticity and isocosts/quants....everything else I can bluff.

Anyway, I'm gonna go on a few more sites...I was just passing anyway.

I dreamt I was fallin, I never woke up,
I dreamt I was fallin, in a yellow buttercup
I dreamt I'm a no-face
Smokin a cigarette she was,
Dancin in a nightclub, with some other guy
I held up a drugstore, my gun was soaking wet
From the barrel, I was tumblin over the edge
Call Me #5

Paul Weller and Kelly Jones - Call Me #5

Can't be bothered to put any song lyrics.....wait, yes I can

You said you'd always go for the underdog,
Hash
Open Up Your Eyes.....
- Monday, January 12, 2004 at 19:55:25 (EST)

Me.

I'm a victim.

A victim of crime!!!!

Basically, the last 6 lines was a prelude, a mere introduuction to the shocking news I received..........House 106,Hendrefoelan Village, Swansea, has been broken into.

FANTASTIC!

Why? Cos it gives us the chance to employ big alsations and stuff and secuirty guars who look like they've been shipped in, especially from Venezuela, and they drink black coffee (anyone who drinks black coffee has "assassinate me" written on them somewhere) .....no wait, it means that we get new keys, no, thats not it, its the satisfying thought of anyone who did break into my room only found a Bobby Moore poster, a Muhammad Ali poster, a Russia shirt (think I'm gonna wear that after they knocked Wales out.....), and my dirty laundry that I spared my mother. Oh, and if they looked under the bed, they would have found my (brothers) leather jacket.

So, what did I do today? Or yesterday, in fact. I stood in the freezing rain (at least it was wet, it could have been hail, we were'nt sure) and played football. Yep, trudging around in a cut-up goalmouth, imitating the beautiful game. Or at least, the way me, Shea, Lake and Olly played it (Smit wussed out, my brother ws sleeping, Mat was painting a fence, Rob was pissed), it looked like the brother they keep in the basement.

After this, we thought forget that for a good intention and aftdr a short intermission, (showers and the ilk), we played snooker. A group of less in form players you won't see. The highest break in four frames was 13, when Olly spawned both pink and black. Not happy with him though. The boy Binks called me a felcher (if you don't know, don't ask). All because I red shelled him at Mario Kart.

I'm not missing Swansea in the least. At the moment, I'm talking to fellow insomniac Alison, a conversation that has encompassed smoking, llama, zebra spiders, twister, Janes Addiction and prawn chow mein. Plus her fondness for VW Beetles (old-style only). I think everyone is going back on Saturday or Sunday. Me?? I'm gonna flip a coin, and in some crazy Sky style: I'm going to do it now, using a ten pence piece.....

Best of three:

If heads: Saturday
If tails: Sunday

Tails, Heads, Heads

Saturday it is then - Same way they pick the Pope.

*Looks up at CD rack to decide which song lyrics to put in*

The show is over, close the storybook
There Will be no encore,
And all the random hands I have shook,
They're all reaching for the door
I watch their backs, as they leave single file,
But you stood, stubbourn, cheering all the while

Verve Pipe - Colourful

*PING*.......IT'S THE TRIANGLE OF DEATH........DAH DAH DAH DAH
(Can't belive I never used that before)
Hash

Standing In The Rain
- Thursday, January 08, 2004 at 20:20:45 (EST)

3 days before I go back to Swampy and I haven't done any revision. Ah well. I'm not gonna use my dad dying as an excuse cos thats not how it should be. I haven't done any revision, because, well, I'm lazy, see? I've stopped turning lights off when I leave rooms and stiff, thats how lazy I am, simply cos I don't have to pay the electricity bill when I'm in Hendrefoelan.

Me and Rob have decided to hopefully go to the ROCK AM Ring festival in Germany over the summer, which should be cool. Slightly worrying thought: All the bands and artists I like (Rory Gallagher, Audioslave [can I go though a diary entry without mentioning them], all the other obscure shite) tend to be big in Germany. Break out the Lederhosen!! *coughs*

Met up with Rob, Ros and Matt today. Rob and myself were initially going to go into Starbucks, but wzs too crowded. Thank **** we didn't - honestly, I don't like that place. it's the first time I've been in there, and I stand by what I say to most people - it's f'n yuppieville. Smit and Will also met up with us as well. Will was his normal Johnathan Ross humoured self, and wanted to use the little stairlift thing in the Bell. We didn't let him.

Should I put some song lyrics in here?? Why not...

Every official that comes in,
Cripples us, leaves us maimed
Silent and Tamed
And with our flesh and bones,
He builds his home

RATM - War Within A Breath

Now for the benefit of Wilma, Rob's web diary is at www.livejournal.com/users/fall_guy and for everyone else, our flatmates website is... something I can't find because Hotmail is being a **** again. Hey, guess what my New Years Resolution is....yep, stop swearing.

We found your weakness, It's hiding right outside the door
Hash
3 Days Left.....And I Don't Care
- Wednesday, January 07, 2004 at 14:55:02 (EST)

So, a new year and I just realised I Have a month left of being 18. What the fuck?? When did everything start creeping up on me? I'm beginning to feel as if I dopn't really have much control of my life. To quote from a book: "Nothing is arbitrary".

WHY O WHY O WHY do computers have to be such complicated things? Couldn't find Laplink (allows you to connect a computer to a laptop) in the shops, so downloaded it instead. Then had to get a wire, chose a parrellel port wire, XP is gay and decided not to recognise my printer port, so have to get a serial port. On top of this, I lost 2 AND A HALF GIGBYTES of music (thats over a 100 songs) so now have to upload 110 CDs. And if that wasn't enough, lost all my cover art, so have been trawling through Amazon (in Netscape, cos my sis fecked up Explorer) saving album covers. My God, I'm tired. And I hate computers. It's about this time where I wanna break out the popcorn and watch the Shawshank Redemption, so I'll do that in a moment.

Erm, Wilma, my diary "weeps pure emotion and speaks from the heart". Awwww, shucks, I thought that was just indigestion. Ah, the crap jokes begin.....
And when you wanted me, I came to you,
And when you wanted someone else, I withdrew
And when you asked for light, I set myself on fire
So here I go, far away, you'll know, you find another slave

Audioslave - What you Are

If I Could Change Your Mind, I'd Really Love To Break Your Heart!
Hash

Sling It 2003!!
- Thursday, January 01, 2004 at 16:59:08 (EST)

I should go to sleep, but after reading Will's blatant act of plagirism (sp??), I thought I'd add aa coupla more awards...

Excuse of the Year: "His leg was already broken, ref!" Unnamed Sunday League Player
The only DVD I bought this year: Shawshank Redemption
Song I'm Listening To: Bulls on Parade by RATM
Cover of the Year: Disturbeds' version of Shouut by Tears for Fears
Time I'm at Work Tomorrow: 9 (!!)
Time it took me to hack the school website: 26 minutes
My next website victim: A midrange company

This hacking thing is getting easier... I can break into peoples PC's if I'm talking to them on MSN, which could be funny....so if your mouse starts appearing funny, its probably me.

Anyway, thats enough sleep delaying

The Day I tried to live,
I stole a thousand beggars change,
and gave it to the rich, yeah
The day I tried to live
I wallowed in the blood and mud
like all the other pigs
Singing One more time around
One more time around
The day I Tried To Live
I should have stayed in bed
The day I tried to live
I learned that I was a liar
Just Like You
One More Time Around

Soundgarden - Day I Tried To Live
One More Time Around
Hash
More Awards....Mmm, Sleep Delaying...
- Tuesday, December 30, 2003 at 18:44:25 (EST)

Another update. It really doesn't feel like Christmas. This is probably because I am really missing my dad now.

I'm gonna continue with the awards (they're not rally, but its a nice term), until I can't think of any more.

Funniest Moment of the Year: Slipping over at the same time as Rob at work (yesterday in fact)
My prediction for Euro 2004: Germany
The Propaganda Central Award: George W.'s trip to Iraq or the Queens Speech
2nd Place in Song Lyrics: "Things Aren't The Way They Were Before, You Wouldn't Even Recognise Me Anymore - linkin Park -In The EndFree CD of the Year: X-RAy 6 - Mars Volta, Stellarstar* - damn good
Wind-Up of the Year: My tradings standard impression
Most Overhyped News of the Year: Beckhams transfer
3rd Place in Song Lyrics: "Too Late! It's already days and weeks before we can make ends meet" - Cave In - Anchor
Last Book I Read: Michael Moore's Stupid White Men
Pet hate of the Year: Losing My Chemical Brothers CD
Price of a Pint in Swansea Student Bar: £1.40
Times Alan has been sick: 5
Times I've Been to Norfolk and Norwich Hospital: 3
Biggest Faux Pas: Wearing my england shirt when seeing a German doctor...I didn't mean to....
Goals Scored When Playing Football With The Malaysians: 26-odd
Money It Will Cost to Fix My Laptop: £75-odd......mmmmmm, haggling
Best Album James Lent Me: The Sickness by Disturbed
Best New Band: Electric Six - Dammit, I heard of them long before most people....bastards
Times I wanted to punch Liam: 47
Weirdest Album Name: Deloused in the Comatorium by the Mars Volta
Weirdest Album: The Music - Self Titled, or Simian - We Are Your Friends
Best Downloaded Song: Bandages by Hot Hot Heat
Person I Missed Most at Uni: Jayne
Person I Missed Least at Uni: Too Many to Mention
Best Film I Saw: Blackball or Underworld
Fall outs I didn't want to happen: 11
Fall outs I Did: 1
Song I'm Listening to at the Moment: Chemical Brothers - Piku
Times I'm Glad To Be At Swansea: 14
Days Before I Go Back: 18 then back for another 10 HAHA
My e-mail address: hashimpiperdy@Hotmail.com
People who have emailed me from this diary: 5

Hmm......I reckon that will do for now.... I know no-one else is as sad as me, which is why their diaries ain't being updated, also, does anyone fancy a chance to run the turkey off?? If so, a game of football at the Rec onSunday at10inthe morning?? That would rock.

Song Lyrics - Can't be bothered to copy and paste a whole song so.....

I Don't Want Peace and Quiet
If it Means Walking Unidentified,
Divided Here Together,
I'll Make My Own Way to The Exit!

Hell is For Heroes - Retreat

Know Your Enemy
Hash

2 in 2 days!
- Thursday, December 25, 2003 at 16:53:40 (EST)

Because I'm bored, tired, slightly deranged and possibly bleeding internally (thanks James), I think I'll do some quotes and other weird shit that springs o mind. Other then spelling mistakes, I am not going to use the backspace key.

Best Song I Heard This Year: The Walls Get Smaller - The Music
Worst Song: Anything playing from my sisters room, unless its one of my CD's
Best Album I Bought: The Music or Audioslave (Both Self-titled)
Best Quote: Would Tim Almey please go to customer services.... *noise from somewhere in the warehouse "OH FUCK!"
Times I Cried: 11
Times I Felt That Sociology with Mrs. Ki*g was a waste of time: 18
Times I Actually Did Anything About It: 2
Jobs Held This Year: 2
Bloke of The Year: Man with Dog, My mate Rob or my dad
Diary Entry of the Year: Wilmas one on Sept 11 or my mate Robs' on relationships... the best damn entry none of you heartless bastards read!
Song Lyric... "I Wanna Hold You High and Steal Your Pain" Seether-Broken
Times I've Regretted Swansea: 23-odd
Complete Twat of the Year: George W. or ****** - You know who you are
Best person I met in Freshers' week: My flatmate Steff
Worst " " " " ": Jo
Most Changed Person for the worse: Elen
Most changed person for the better: My sister
Most Overplayed Song: Cochise by Audioslave by me, or Bad Day by Rem by my flatmates
Most Underrated Band: Disturbed, Seether or Inme
Person with Hidden Depths: James or Matt
Author of the Year: Ian Rankin, and the John Rebus books - Thanks Alan
Soul-Crusher of the Year: Westlife
Person most likely to buy a random stranger a drink (without sexual motive): Matt
Person most likely to buy a random stranger a drink (with sexual motive) Matt
Joke of the Year (no-one else will get this): Dion........
Lie of the Year: Anyone who said "I love you" or me: "See you at home, dad". Fuckin hell, need to change the how many times I cried this year bit.....
Persons Who've ALWAYS been there for me: Rob and Jayne
Moment of the Year: When Igot the PM award, getting my A-Level Resuklts, or the entire weekend in Chester
Worst Moment...Saying goodbye to my dad....It still feels weird
Person who So Doesn't Deserve to Be Screwed Over: Ros
Person Who Does: Liam
Year Rating Using the Globally-Recognised System of x out-of 576: 134.

I guess all of the above shows how clutterred and irrelevant everything is at the moment. I'm working at Sainsburys again, which is cool, cos you can royally piss about, but everything seems to be being done on autopilot. Everything is a matter of routine....my new years resolution is to *coughs loudly* and also to work out who I actually am, the soul-searching and self-doubt still isn't going and it's annoying me now.

Also, on Tuesday, whilst waiting for a bus home, I stood in the same queue as Lucy Fox, who either didn't recognise me, or sidn't want to talk to me. I mention this because its entirely possible for me to walk past some people and they won't recognise me. This is good.
Worked 10-6 today, left at 5 due to boredom with Rob who gave me a lift home, which was nice of him. Sat in his car and talked for about 20 minutes, which was cool. The bloke talks a lot of sense, its just the advice he gives is difficult to follow, because its very difficult to do. I'm actually really glad I'm his mate, cos he's a top bloke and also, hes gonna give me a job when hes' ruling South America or something. Also, my advice to him........END IT, start again. Whats that girl on the Deli's name again? ;)

I think that will do rright now, Rob's just signed in, so I'm gonna talk to him for a bit. Don't know why I put this link up, but I'm going to anyway: www.livejournal.com/users/fall_guy

I'll finish with a song:

this vacation's useless
these white pills aren't kind
i've given a lot of thought on this 13-hour drive
i missed the grinding concrete where we sat past 8 or 9
and slowly finished laughing in the glow of our headlights
i've given a lot of thought to the nights we use to have
the days have come and gone
our lives when but so fast
i faintly remember breathing on your bedroom floor
where i laid and told you but you sweared you loved me more

do you care if i don't know what to say
will you sleep tonight or will you think of me
will i shake this off pretend its all okay
that there someone out there who feels just like me
there is

those notes you wrote me
i've kept them all
i'll give a lot of thought of how to write you back this fall
with every single letter in every single word there
will be a hidden message about a boy that's
loves a girl
do you care if i don't know what to say
will you sleep tonight or will you think of me
will i shake this off
pretend its all okay
that there's someone out there who feels just like me
there is

do you care if i don't know what to say?
will you sleep tonight or will you think of me
will i shake this off
pretend its all okay
that there's someone out there who feels just like me
do you care if i don't know what to say?
will you sleep tonight or will you think of me
will i shake this off
pretend its all okay that there's someone out there who feels just like me
there is

Boxcar Racer - There Is

Greet The Last Remaining Light:
Hash
End Of Year Awards
- Wednesday, December 24, 2003 at 15:55:00 (EST)

The Summary Line being a RATM lyric. Currently I'm listening to Sinch: Something More, whilst making myself a minidisc for tomorrow, when I should see Rob, which will rock. Haven't seen him since I came back when my dad was ill.

Had work today. Most people at Kett, this will mean nothing so you amy as well skip to the next bit. elen seemed really different. You know how you think you know a oerson....well, I think I was wrong about her. Beleive me, I don't want any special treatment cos of my dad, but she just looked past me to her boyfriend Liam. This seems to sum up how I feel. Second fucking best, or in some cases, not even there. All the bitterness is threatening to rise up, so we're gonna leave it.

Found myself loooking at charity packages abroad today. I know I can't leave uni, but it just seems like the right thing to do right now... got put into my group project for economics... Angelas in it, so thats ok, but theres tossers... people with double-barrelled surnames and the like...Urgh...ah well...get through it, get through it.

The Music: Human. I've decided to put the music I'm listening to as I write the diary. Maybe some people will be inspired to download these songs. The one I wrote at the beginning of this paragraph is brilliant, but it will hopefully clear up confusion if you see a random piece of text.

Had a thought today, DR E. Why do you not keep a web diary?? Surely this would be interesting....and be a diary thats updated frequently?? Only Becky Mercurys diary seems to be updated a lot... my sis was tellin me, "I don't like that, too much weird stuff in it". She probably doesnt understand it. Bless. I like it, and I went to her website thing, which is pretty good. RATM: Year of Tha Boomerang.

My flatmates seem quiet in that besides Alan, Steff and Alison texting me about my dad, I haven't heard anything else. Maybe they're ignoring me. The Music: Truth is No Words. Seriosuly, text me or something... I tend to be a reactive person, so obviously, its better when I react to what you're saying, then staarting up a conversation

I'll end this entry by just saying thanks to Will, who made me smile with what he wrote. Yes, we always were good mates and my dad thought you were pretty cool. It still feels weord to be writing about him in the past tense. I'm still expecting him to be watching some football or cricket on the TV, eating some sandwiches or something. It will always feel weird.

Evolution Revolution Love (Another Fantastic Song)
Hash
Turn On The Radio...Nah Fuck It, Turn It Off
- Thursday, December 18, 2003 at 18:39:39 (EST)

Erm, I know the last entry was going to be my lasyt for a while, but I decided that I'm gonna keep fighting. So, I'm not gonna stop writing in this. So, Mr Doc Sir, ignore that part of the email I sent you please.

I restart work tomorrow 10-7 if anyone fancies comin into Sainsburys. Also, its been one week since my dad died. Got to keep busy....

Yes, Yes I'm A Hypocrite, Thats What The award was for!

This Is My Music Box......
Hash
Yeah Yeah I Know
- Wednesday, December 17, 2003 at 18:28:48 (EST)

The summary line sums it up...basically..........

I was going to come home Saturday and spend some time with my dad and revise and work and see my mates in Norwich but on Wednesday I got a phonecall from my mum who told me to come home. My stuff was alredy packed, so after a quick farewell to my flatmates, I set off.

I got home to Norwich at about half eleven. My mum told me that dad was in hospital and had an operation in the morning (a lobectomy). Basically, he had a chest infection, which combined with his heart, meant it was very dangerous.

I stayed up all night and got to the hospital at half six, with my mum and sister (my brother had come home earlier and stayed the night in hospital with my dad).

He went in for his operation at half ten/eleven... and got through it. Unfortunately they didnt remove the infection completely.

At half past five on Thursday December 11, my dad died.

The funeral was today. I think I share my dads' attitude when I say that funerals are good in the goodbye thing, but there is way too much bullshit that surrounds them, in that family members that you've never seen before come up and tell you they're sorry. Sorry for what exactly?? I dunno, I'm just angry and low right now.

Now, I don't know what I'm going to do. I want to leave uni for a bit and go travelling: Find out who I am, see if I am trustworthy (Thats a pointed comment and only a few people will know what that means). Recently, not just with my dad passing, I've had my beliefs questioned. I'm tempted to go all-out and write about it, write about her, but my bridges don't need burning, I guess I'm just spilling the petrol, before I light the match. This is too much, something has to give soon. I'm sick of being on my own. I want to leave and start all over, but I know my dad wouldn't want that. His attitude: stick it out,fight. I'm sick of fighting, there's very little left to fight for anyway.

Like the summary says, this is the last entry for a while, if Dr. E still wants me to write ont his when I feel ready, then I'll be more than happy to do so.

Thanks, Doc.
Hash

The Last entry For A While...
- Tuesday, December 16, 2003 at 18:53:49 (EST)

Erm, I won't be going to the awards thingy after all, think I'm gonna spend the evening in hospital with my dad instead.

Got to keep my priorities sorted

HOME ON SATURDAY....OR SOONER!!
Hash
Hmm, Not Going After All
- Tuesday, December 09, 2003 at 19:18:28 (EST)

If theres sufficient interest in it, I'll go...Anyone else going? Oh wait, my brother comes home that day, buggery. I'm tempted, who else is going??

Can't think of something to put here
Hash
The Awards Evening
- Monday, December 08, 2003 at 16:35:29 (EST)

My god, Half two in the morning. I'm not even close to being tired. I'm currently listening to RATM - Bulls on Parade which is probably what is keeping me awake right now.

The reason I'm up at the moment is the YR-11 style insomnia is kicking in again. Perhaps this is because my dad is ill. Again. Everytime this happens, I really get very very worried. If something happens to him whilst I'm here, I have no idea what I am going to do.

Before I get into that rant again, I decided to read Wilmas web diary...butit didnt send me to sleep.

Alan and Pete found my web diary. Honestly, they're joined at the hip...or somewhere pretty close anyway. I decided I'm not going to "censor" my web diary and how I feel cos thats wrong. Apparently Peter went to a load of search engines and typed in "Quality Hash". Didn't find the link he was looking for... can't think why. They've forced me to run a correction though: Apparently, they didn't play Bad Day 17 times, merely 6 times in a row. Still, thats about 5 times too many.

Today, they bought a bottle of White Spirit. They doused a tennis ball in it, and set it alight.... and then started playing football with it. Now, does anyone else think thats going a bit too far?? Anyone? You, at the back there, what do you think?? Personally, that could have gone so wrong... and I don't think they're going to stop until it does. I have an ominoius feeling that one of them is going to get seriously hurt.

I can't wait to come home. To see how much everything has changed, whether it still pisses it down with rain every other day, it might even snow!! To see my mates from work will rock so much! Elen, Rob, James, Ros and even el-gropo himself, Matt, its gonna rock... I talk to at least one of them every day, and I really miss them, for reasons I've explained before.

I'm into the final week now.... Some lectures are being cancelled, some are running to the death. This sounds really sad, but I like the majority of my lectures. The lecturers are really good, and sometimes it feels like I'm back in Rm 66 and am being taught about "your friend and mine, the circular flow of income" by Mr. Allerhand, who I think of now and again when I'm doung an essay. I know that sounds weird, but in his own way, I thought he was a fantastic teacher. Wonder if hes used his acid bath yet?? and I have the welcome news of only having one exam (Principles of Economics), which is on the 14th of January. Lectures start again on the 26th. So, brainbox here is tempted to go in for the exam and then come home for another 12 days. Which is nice.

Nice to see that people are reading this. Sometimes, it seems like I'm shouting at a brick wall, but I'm getting a few emails, which is cool. Alan said to me after reading this that a) he and Pete liked Wilmas diary, and b) if I had any grievances, that we should talk about it. Now, here I could have gone into a rant about how he and Pete...EDIT!! but I didn't, I will though, cos its not going to do me any favours otherwise. It's just that...well, he has a very punchable face...thats a weird statement but its true. I have written down everything thats annoyed me regarding him (and where he goes, Pete is sure to follow).

I feel isolated again. I need to escape and do something no-one else does. Like on Tuesdays, theres this inprovistaional theatre thing running. I may go to that, sounds like a laugh, the people that do it though. Thats the main thing. For anyone applying for uni, make sure you get put with decent people. If you don't like them, or get on with them, tell them or get a transfer to another house.

Hey, guess who wants to come home. Just one more week, just one more week....*Repeat to Fade*

So, We Put It Up Against A Chemical Brothers Beat and Got Something Out Of It!
Hash
Yes It's late
- Sunday, December 07, 2003 at 21:55:36 (EST)

Okay, Okay, its another short entry, but I promise, the next entry will be a longer one. EX-YR13's - Update your diaries!!!

Also, is anyone going to the awards thing?? My sister mentioned it in passing the other day.... thats a point, when is it??

Not long til I get home now...
Hash
3 In A Row....Oops
- Monday, December 01, 2003 at 12:57:34 (EST)

Just a quick note to anyone saying I'm back in Norwich on December 12, so if anyone wants to meet up etc. just email me on hashimpiperdy@Hotmail.com

Find My Way Back Home When I Learn To Fly
Hash
So It Did Update
- Tuesday, November 25, 2003 at 07:22:40 (EST)

Okay, I updated this yesterday, but it doesn't seem to have come up. Anyway, I'll update it when I have more time.

Hate to Say I Told You So
Hash

Thats Odd
- Monday, November 24, 2003 at 15:25:58 (EST)

Hello again, this weekend was cool. Steff is still here and England won something or other :D but I realised I have less than three weeks before I get a month off, how good is that? I've nearly survived (yes, that is the right word) the first few months in Swansea.

This week was alright, am now starting to get the hang of quadratic equations and other irrelevant shite like that. Handed in that crappy essay, although I think the graphs might save it.

Anyways, about an hour ago, Alan was blowing up a rubber glove (don't ask) with a bike pump. Eventually, this is meant to explode. Unfortunately, Kim (who was a away for the weekend and hadn't slept) was trying to sleep, when she came downstairs and Peter took things........ a little too far. Steff threw one of his knives at thew glove and it exploded though, which was quite funny.

Bush coming to the UK: Next....

Anyway, I'm off, Di Canio sooooooo dived.

Fire In The Disco!! Fire In The Taco Bell!
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Expanding Rubber Gloves
- Sunday, November 23, 2003 at 17:58:14 (EST)

"Write 2000 words on how the four aims of macroeco-ARGH!!! I'm just taking a break from an essay I'm doing. I'm sure I did a similar one at A-Level, but looking through the folder, it ain't there. Then again, with my filing system, I'm not surprised.

Anyway, I got a job. You know those annoying people who phone at the most inappropriate times trying to sell you windows.... thats' me. Job interviews are quite easy really...ah, just had fond memories of our CS lessons and Dr.E laughing at one of my answers with "I can't fault that". Ah, happy days.

Elsewhere, Steff is still undecided about whether or not he's gonna leave. He better not! The ganging up of Peter and Alan is getting worse. Other than that though, Swansea can't be faulted. Oh yeah, Steff has given me a load of his PC hacking tools, and shown me how to use them....*EVIL LAUGH*.

We have a house inspection on Thursday, we're thinking of completely paintbombing upstairs so they fail but that might be taking it too far. It's like a police state up there. Hannah and Jess (already best mates before they came here) had taken away their microwave etc. and labelled their stuff after "Alangate" (glass throwing away incident) and Alison and Kim weren't too happy. Anyway that all seems sorted now, although Hannah is away this week because she gets a reading week!! Damn law students....I WANT A READING WEEK!!

Oh, I won't say too much about it here as I don't know much about it yet but....the student radio thing is one step closer.

Anyway, thats about as much as I'm going to write right now, I'll see you all later....

We Dare You To Mean A Single Word You Said
Hash
Break From Essays and Research
- Tuesday, November 18, 2003 at 15:26:12 (EST)

ARGH!!!! More random panic. Yesterday, after buying my raincoat, today is sunny... sunny beyond belief. Jeez, ah well... this is Swansea, it will rain...
we have ways of making it so....

Anyway, I wrote out my CV yesterday and its pretty good, I've e-mailed it to my brother who will probably pick 6000 holes in it as he good at that sort of thing, yet hell, I reckon its' good enough.

Because I didn't do A-Level Maths, the university have put me on the non-A-Level maths course (obviously) which is really hard. I'm struggling through it, again, asked my brother for advice who came back with the reply "I got a First in Statistics!" Thanks mate.

I just had a Philosophy lecture. Philosophy is odd, I'm basically a part-timer at it as I'm only doing the one module (logic and argument) so I don't know anyone in it. Also, everyone seems very stuck up who does it. It is very, very difficult to talk to anyone as I can't see anyone with even similar interests to me. I hate being isolated.

Oh note to the Doc, I've put you as one of the references on my CV. Hope you don't mind. Also, the new Matrix film is really really good. Says something, when Reloaded came out, i was fretting about my A-Levels and other completely irrelevent stuff. Don't times change.

With thoughts of nothing, no-one, nobody, NO MORE!
Hash
Jobs Jobs Jobs Numbers Jobs
- Wednesday, November 12, 2003 at 08:36:18 (EST)

Just had the two-minute silence thing. In the main library study hall. It kind of does something to you...or me at least. Just sitting with about 500 (?) other people paying your respects. Maybe I have different sentiments to other people.

Swansea is better than my last entry. I don't really feel that isolated, particularly not since Stef came back from home, only he's thinking of leaving and taking a year out, doing a different course. Feck. If he leaves, it means its' me, Alan and Pete downstairs. Wonder if we can advertise for a flatmate.

To be honest, I don't want Stef to leave. He's actually a really cool bloke, just really laid back... actually that might be alcoholism but I'm not sure. I've told him that it will pass, but he's really not sure.

Talked to my dad for the first time in about a week yesterday night. It always seems that he's out getting his dialysis done when I phone but the conversation we had was quite interesting. Dunno why I wrote that, guess I'm just filling. Oh yeah, am now a member of the Staff-Student committee which rocks cos it sounds pretty grand and it's only two meetings a year. Plus, I get to say what the lecturers are like *Evil Laugh.....turns into a hacking cough*. Actually, I think I'm getting another fecking cold/flu virus type thing. Thats more illnesse than I had in the past two years! Must get some warm clothes...and a job etc..

For those that care about football, skip to next paragraph. For those that care about hurting your neck, how good are Leicester?? Not very, to be honest, but, we're not completely screwed yet. To Fordy: I'm confident we'll stay up, and the Nationwide team (at the moment) would be Norwich.

Amyway, I think I'm going to get myself a raincoat from the city...my god, does life get anymore exciting?

Too Far, Too Hard, Too High to Climb
Hash

Communal Sorta Thing
- Tuesday, November 11, 2003 at 06:18:57 (EST)

Hello again. Firstly, Swansea is a great place. Honest. I do want to stay here and I will. I'm not going to leave. But I just seem to feel a little... excluded. I thought I'd been over the homesickness bit but when I went home, I didn't really want to leave. Also, I miss quite a few people. I'm not going to name them here cos its' not really appropriate, but we talk and that makes it better. I really want to see them though.

My flatmates don't exactly help. At the weekend, its normally me, Peter (who is from Kent so can't really get back either), Alan and Alison from upstairs. Peter and Alan are on the same course so they hang about together and Alison seems to know everyone in Cardiff (shes from there). As a result, I feel like I'm an outsider looking in on stuff. Sometimes, this is good, like when I need to work (like I should be doing now). But other times, Peter and Alan seem to gang up on me... f'ers. Not nastily, just annoyingly. They are both REM fans. Now, don't get me wrong, not a bad band, but when you play "Bad Day" (fairly shite song) 17 times in a row on full blast its not doing anyone any favours. Now, I have a laptop and my music ain't gonna be able to compete against that. Gits. I may have to resort to what Alan "accidentally" did to my White Stripes CD and get chilli sauce over it.

Also, I was just reading some of the diaries and I noticed something. All the stereotypes of a typical group seem to be holding. You have a few people on a year out (Carl, Paula, Danny) etc., some people that went to their hometown university....wait sorry, college (Will), some people that opted not to go to uni (Stu, Fordy) and a couple of mates who went to the same uni (Lake ad Smit). Oh, and me, the one that buggers off as far as possible. I'm really trying hard not to regret this. Even my mum misses me!! Thats' a) a very scary thought and b) a great use of alliteration.

On the subject of diaries, take any given diary and read their first entry, then the last entry they make (not this one cos this is consistently an inane ramble) and at the risk of sounding like an English teacher, everyones writing has got better...perhaps they should make these compulsory for people.

I'm determined not to get into rugby, its very difficult not to because its bigger than anything else and the World Cup is on. Also, today, England played Wales so I'm camping in my room until the blood clears.

Anyway, I'm dragging this out like a gibbon (Oh yes, gets the phrase in), so I'll leave it here until next time.

Maybe.....come dancing with me?
Hash

Your Ad Here
- Sunday, November 09, 2003 at 08:07:33 (EST)

I just saw someoine, selling plants outside the uni theatre wearing...a Norwich scarf!!! I'm actually quite shocked! Simply because it's the first reminder of home since I got here that wasn't anything to do with me. As I was walking with a mate, I overcame the urge to go ask her whether she was from Norwich, and anyway, as Wilma well knows, talking to strange women can often get you arrested (your turn, Will).

Anyways, shite football teams excluded (ducks the thrown bottle again), there is a really really good entry on relationships written by my ex-workmate Rob. The link for which is www.livejournal.com/users/fall_guy. Its really cool but takes a couple of reads to understand. I've put a link up for it and may start demanding ad royalties from him.

Last week was fairly uneventful. The girls upstairs think we threw chilli at their windows. We didn't, but Jess and Alan had a blazing row about it and also a matter of international security - Alan threw Jess' cup away as it had a chip in it. Yes, this is how exciting my life is at the moment, a hometown scarf and a chipped cup. I feel like a certain really boring, also teaches my sister maths teacher on sedatives.

Although, it isn't that boring, as Alan had to go to hospital on Sunday night, Monday morning as he cut his thumb quite badly on a Stanley knife. The reason he was using a Stanley knife was because he was cutting open a tin of frozen shaving foam as we read that this, when it cools down in an enclosed space....I don't know, an upstairs drawer. It expands to up to five times its volume. Anyway, I phoned the ambulance and Steff kept him calm....then he blacked out. He's alright now, he isn't playing it up as much as I thought he would though.

Thats' all I can really think of, except Steff managed to get the website up and running. It's at www.angelfire.com/zine2/stupidpictures. It rocks, but then I'm part of it, so I would say that, anyway.

I'm Gonna Stay Here With You. Theres Nothing Else To Do.
Hash
Theres Another One!!
- Tuesday, November 04, 2003 at 08:23:40 (EST)

My god, whata boring weekend. Everyone except Peter went home or other places this weekend. Leaving me and Peter to our own devices. It was quite funny to be fair. We went up to this big moor that surrounds the village. The view was awesome. Seriously, you can see everything from there. Next time I go, I'm going to take a camera with me. I wish you could see it, you can see the beach and the water and the fields and....the entire moor is covered in horses*it!

Anyway, after the clocks went back, it was Alisons' birthday. That was quite funny as her and Alan decided to have a drinking contest. Alan had come back from Bristol on a train, and had drank about four whisky and cokes on the train, so he go severely wrecked. So wrecked in fact, that he drank vodka.....mixed with Malaysian hot sauce, fairy liquid, expresso coffee beans, ketchup, mayonaise, and a whole load of other crap. Needless to say, he was sick during the night.

Don't know whether I wrote this before, but I've bought a laptop and the bloke seems pretty genuine about it. Should be cool, now I can write my note up.

Oh yeah, one question: Where is the half term for university? I am not happy about this....damn 6th formers....lol. Anyways, I'm going into town to find myself a "tidy" (local dialect) job....knowing my luck, it will be a job tidying.

Caught By The River (What a great song)
Hash

Weekends With One Flatmate Are Boring
- Tuesday, October 28, 2003 at 06:41:25 (EST)

Ok, how did they know? Got a text message from my mate Rob this morning telling me that my boss at work has already put me in for some hours at Sainsburys when I get back. Funny that, since I was going to phone up and ask for my job back at Christmas. This should be cool. I miss almost everyone there, for reasons I've explained before. I was just wondering whether anyone else feels like this? Whether anyone misses their jobs and actually having to do some work?? Whilst getting paid, of course.

I've got two hours of lectures left today before I can sleep. I may fall asleep before though. If you've seen the office and the David Brent guy, thats one of my lecturers. On top of this, he's an Ipswich fan. He also did my interview and realises that I'm from Norwich so picks me out for all the difficult questions. F*****.

The Kett forum seems pretty cool. I reckon it needs some people to register though! Can't remember the weblink, but its on the graffiti wall or somewhere. Blimey. Thats the most campaigning I've done for the Kett, ever. (My English is getting so poor).

I had a look at some of my houses' website and its' very cool. The picture of my flatmate Peter smoking a....(you'll find out) is so f'd up it makes Wilma look normal. C'mon Will, I almost miss your insults.

Anyway, I can't think of something to write, so I'll leave it until next time, which will probably be Monday.

8 Out of 10 Voices in My Head say: DO IT!!
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Pre-emptive F*******
- Friday, October 24, 2003 at 09:38:01 (EDT)

Oh yeah, I forgot, was reading Carls web diary and it mentioned photos, which jogged my memory. I may (if I can find out how, or get my computerscience flatmate Stef to do it) to upload some photos of things at the village. No Wilma, not those photos....

Hash < >
, - Monday, October 20, 2003 at 10:40:44 (EDT)

Okay, the addiction is still in force. Thank goodness for an overdraft. One of my flatmates has a similar dilemma. He got a letter from his bank manager today saying that his credit card details may be obtained by crooks: Nope, he told me. He too has been on ebay buying shitloads of useless stuff. I'd hate to be our postman.

Wilma, you git. That summary was gonna be mine. Damn you. Ah well, a Libertines (whoever said "who?" will be disembowelled) lyric should do ok. I've got my Economic Methods and Skills lecture today, only today is going to be the start of the maths. Let the fun begin! I hate maths, I'm no good at it. ARGH!! Oh well *deep breaths".......

Glad to hear I'm not the only one who is addicted to ebay (see, there I go again). Must hide bank details and all forms of communication for about 44 days, in a glass box. Hmm. Sounds familiar only he didn't even break the world record. Apparently the record for doing nothing in a box goes to Iwan Roberts, whose been doing it for the past 6 years. *Bottles are thrown*.

Thank you, I'm here all week,
Hash
Don't Look Back Into The Sun
- Monday, October 20, 2003 at 10:34:38 (EDT)

Because my Don King impression seems to falter in about 3 seconds, lets see if I can do it in writing. I know this'll be shite but I had the idea in Tescos the other day, so it mus be right.

Okay....

It's the most fantabulous, splendiferous event known to mankind. The World's grestest match, only in Cyberspace and my bank account. Yes, these two behemoths (told you it was shite) collide for the first and not possibly the last time. Have mercy for the loser as weighing in at *cough* pounds, my student loan vs. the power of Ebayyyyyyyyyy!!!

Basically, thats a really long winded way of saying I'm addicted. See? I'm already recovering. I can admit I have a problem. On Thursdays, I have a 3 (count them) hour gap between my lectures. It takes about half an hour to get home, so I'll normally try to find a space in the library, before going home for some lunch and a nap. This time, however (yesterday) I decided I would try to buy a laptop. Mainly because I need to type my notes into. And because 11 hours of lectures may drive me insane (only so much you can do in the bucketloads of free periods given).

Ebay is evil (see? more recovery). It is designed to screw with my loan and give my bank manager a headache. I haven't actually bought anything yet. Although I've come close and had to e-mail the seller to get out of it.

If anyone knows of anywhere where I can get a cheap, preferably not stolen laptop from, I'd be more than grateful if you could e-mail me, unless you're my brother, who won't let me nick his. He does Business Studies for f sake. And I thought economics was easy. (Only kidding). Seriously, anyone know of a cheap laptop place that deleivers to Wales? Anyone? OK, I'll send you a postcard if you do. Can't say fairer than that.

All I Need Is One More Bid,
Hash
hashimpiperdy@Hotmail.com
The Worlds Greatest Match
- Friday, October 17, 2003 at 09:30:29 (EDT)

Hello. I've just spent the weekend at home, which is where I'm writing this from. Fairly quiet although I managed to see Rob and Elen (both from work) who were telling me about what had happened etc.

Anyways, walked to school with my sister and found it really, really strange. I haven't had to wake up in the morning and do stuff for ages. It scared me a little. My timetable starts at 10 at the earliest! Anyways, I'm going back (nearly wrote home but that isn't right) at 12. Anyone wanna phone or text me? Train journeys are very boring. Hopefully I'll even take the right underground train as well. Bloody London.

Goin Back to Swampie.
Hash
Home
- Monday, October 13, 2003 at 05:15:06 (EDT)

Had a 10 am start today. Promised myself that I was going to walk, when I saw a double decker bus outside the village and decided to sit upstairs. I think I have a bump on my head now. Anyways, weekend was good. Quite a lot of good things happened. Still can't find the basketball team and my student e-mail address seems to have been given to all manner of companies (why do I want to go on a trip to North Wales?).

Tuesdays are my worse day. I have two lectures: One starts at 10 for an hour, but the other one doesn't start til five, hence me updating this more regularly than usual. One problem is that you can't have music playing in the compter rooms so I get bored easily. Ah well.

Glad to see that everyone else is settling in, moving or staying well. If anyone is considering university in year 13, I recomend (sp?) Swansea cos everyone is very friendly and it's got a beach. The beach parties in the summer are gonna be good.

My mate Rob went to Amsterdam over the weekend. He was gerbil fodder to one of his mates who was grading for a black belt. He had something like 327 moves (!) demonstrated on him. Although, I'm fearing for him a little. I got him with the most legendary wind up phone call ever and it was the first time I've heard someone have a heart attack on the phone (sorry mate).

Reading the guestbook/graffitti wall: This uniform thing sounds like a bit of a windup. Seriously, the whole point of sixth form was so you could be individual, not shoehorned into a group: Whoever had the idea of teachers wearing uniform though... that made me laugh.

Anyway, I fancy going home and getting some lunch before having my other lecture...hard life, isn't it?

Keep Smiling,
Hash

PS: GET WELL SOON DAD
Lectures Are Boring
- Tuesday, October 07, 2003 at 06:47:18 (EDT)

Ok, all Swanseas computers seem to have dodgy "i" keys. This is annoying. Ah well, rght now, I would normally be in a lecture but the lecturer is "indisposed". I think I have had more cancelled lectures than actual lectures. I've got another one later so I'm gonna head off home for a bit.

I think I'm going slightly insane. OK, I admit it. I am missing Norwich. The homesickness only tends to kick in when I'm inactive. I Also can't find the f'n basketball team. Grr.

Sod it, I can't think of much to say right now, other than I DID SOME IRONING YESTERDAY AND found it strangely pleasant. I'm gong mad. I'm off for some food *Puts huntng hat on* (Copyright Rob)

This Revolution Has Just Begun
Hash
Lectures?
- Thursday, October 02, 2003 at 07:51:17 (EDT)

Anyways, flatmates. When I got there on Saturday, only Steffan (Stef) was there. He's like resident Welshman and is quite cool. Has a brown belt in Judo so I'm not gonna mess with him. Alan and Peter are quiet, but they're quite funny. Alan also (is forced to) enjoys cooking and has been cooking for all of us. We all get on with each other. Being in Tescos' on a Wednesday morning and half two normally has some sort of bonding effect.

Upstairs, the girls are quieter than us. Hannah and Jess were already best mates and are both from Swansea anyways. Kim is from Gloucester but I havr'nt really ytalked to her and Ally (alison) is from Cardiff and is like into good music, which rocks.

To all the prople who are thinking that uni is harder than sixth form....YOU@RE WRONG. My timetable is easier, and I can go home and chill, or piss about on the magnetic dartboard we got, or muck about with people in other houses that we know. If anyone is having trouble with Sixth Form, stick with it because a) when you look back at it, A-Levels are the hardest, and now I'm running downwards and accelarating, and B) IT WILL GET EASIER! I had trouble with sixth form at the start, but now I'm here and if you set your sights on it, you can get where you wanna go as well. That probably sounds like a motivationa;l councillor but hell, its my f'n diary.

Oh, note to my parents: I AM NOT WASTING AWAY. I AM EATING PROPERLY.

Anyway, the homesickness is beginning to creep up on me but I'm determined not to go back to Norwich until Christmas. It just appears when you're not doing anything and you think of everyone in Norwich and what they're doin etc. However, I've worked out a strategy to combat this. I'll get up and do something.

Before I forget, my address for anyone that wants to write to me or send me letterbombs or new clothes (non-iron preferably), House 106, Room 2, Hendrefoelan Student Village, Sketty, Swansea, SA2 7QG. Not to difficult to remember hehe.

Braved the laundrette on Monday morning. All my clothes went in and they all...

came out fine. No pink stuff or shrunken stuff, all I gotta do is iron it. Jeez.

I miss work. Never ever thought I'd say that until the overdraft limit was far off in the distance. Work, I've now realised was what kept me going, simply because a) it financed me and b) I could royally piss about and c) met sum of my best mates there. I've decided I'm gonna go back at Christmas just to f' about sum more. I've drifted into txt spk cos time is tight.

Anyway, my sis is on MSN, so I might as well get th news of how wprried my parents are (sic)

hashimpiperdy@Hotmail.com
07986045614
Time Started: 3-25
Time Finished: 4-23

OK, So It Does Submit....
- Tuesday, September 30, 2003 at 11:24:21 (EDT)

OK, I'm in Swansea, killing time before a lecture and I'm writing this on a PC with a dodgy keyboard. So, it could take a while.

Freshers week and the whole getting to know people: It's overrated. It's really quite easy. Meeting people can happen in the unlikeliest places. In the queue when enrolling, in the library or in the mens urinals (but don't shake hands). Seriously, its pretty damn good. If you can strike up a conversation, soon you're swapping mobile numbers and arranging a whole load of crazy stuff.

Just read that the guestbooks are down, so I'm gonna check that this submits...
It's Getting Better
- Tuesday, September 30, 2003 at 10:45:51 (EDT)

I Can't beleive I'm going. ARGH! Anyone wanna chat at 3am in the morning cos thats when I gotta wake up!!

See you all in about three months. It's gonna f'n rock.

And Will, yes, you have been a good mate. Happy? Happy? Happy Happy Happy?

18 years comes down to this,
Hash

It's all ONE BIG DREAM!!!!!
- Friday, September 19, 2003 at 16:01:21 (EDT)

Started Writing: 00-25
So now it comes down to this.....this is my last day in Norwich for a while. Before I go on some rant, and delete it all with the backspace key, I'd like to direct your attention to my (ex) workmates' and very good friend Rob, or Ronnie,, or Tricky, or whatever he's calling himself this week. Rob, has a web diary, and you can read it by going to www.livejournal.com/users/fall_guy.

Now, 18 years, and I have one day left. I could be really sad and tell you how many hours that is, but seeing as I'm on a PC at a time when most people my age are getting drunk about......now, thats probably sad enough, and besides, I write better when I'm tired.

To sum up how I feel right now is difficult. From walking into Sixth Form on that first day and smiling when I saw the names Richard Lake and Shea Warnes on the same form list, to going home after recieving my exam results and shouting "C'MON!" in true Cliff Starkey (go see Blackball, good film) style, I am a completely, a completely different person......and it f'n rocks. Through High school, I didnt know too much, now I'm a wiser, stronger, person who has qualifications and a future, and all I have to do is get through three years.
I honestly didn't think I'd makle it through Year 12. Too much stuff ended up...distracting me and I had no focus and as a result, I couldn't make the transition between GCSE and AS. It's laughable now, but at the time, I couldn't do anything.

There are a lot of people that I'm going to miss. I'm seeing Rob and Elen at some point today. Along with Ros, and possibly MAtt and JAmes, they have been incredible people to me. They have helped me get through my bad times and celebrated with my good times. Going to Sainsburys was a (for all it's faults) damn good thing and its these people who I am most likely to keep in touch with when I'm older. Thats no knock on people from school, its just that that group were the first real circle of people that accepted me.

However, there are people from school I'm going to miss as well. Firstly, Shea. A person I've never properly fallen out with (and for me, that must be some kind of record). Wilma, your outlook on life is original to others, and I read your last entry (about 9/11) before doing this and you have a gift of being able to move people thorugh words. Good luck with your diploma/degree thing. There are others but its probably more appropriate to tell them in person.

As I'm writing this, I'm scan reading all my welcome pack thingy from Swansea. I'm gonna go in there, not knowing anyone and I have to make friends and choose courses and be intimidated (me? sic) by older students who will, erm, persuade me to join the clay pigeon shooting whilst wearing blue slippers and eating a sandwich society (that almost takes up a whole line). I'm a little scared but one thing I know is that I'll have a steady stream of visitors. If anyone does wanna visit me, perhaps you're bored or you're erm, very bored, just y'know, clear it with me first. If anyone does (does anyone actually read this?) my e-mail address is hashimpiperdy@Hotmail.com and my mobile number is (tempted to give you my driving instructors number but won't) 07986 045614. I also get a phone in my room and when I get that number I'll post that up on here as well.

I realise that this is a very long, stodgy entry but this is how my mind works. And possibly the fact that I'm listening to Killswitch Engage whilst writing this. For those that don't know they're a very heavy rock band.

I'll take four things from Sixth Form. Firstly, the reaction to my award still gives me goosebumps when I remember that. And also a certain person who I talked to afterwards and three different people nnudged their mates and whispered: "he's trying to get with her!!" FANTASTIC. Number two: A good group of mates and a fantastic teacher...Doctor Evans. It was good to be in his form, particularly when I heard some stories of others. Numero Three: My A-Levels: I'm actually proud of them and number four: This one is very difficult to describe but I'll call it a collection of memories, possibly played to a backing track of some sort of moments from school.

My next entry will be some time during freshers' week.

Walking along this supposed golden path,
Hash
Time Finished: 00-57. It took me half an hour to write this, it'll take about 10 to read it, and 16 seconds to forget it.
The Last Day
- Thursday, September 18, 2003 at 19:58:11 (EDT)

Okay, it's been a looooooong time since I last wrote anything in this, but for the 3 and a half readers of this thing, I suppose I should appease (see, I am learning) them.

Firstly, my exams, there was as always seems to be the case, no f'n point in worrying. I got my results that I wanted, although how I managed to get a B in sociology is beyond my, I thought I'd flunked that. But anyway, I'M GOING TO SWANSEA!!! This has to be a good thing. I am completely convinced of this now. My accomodation has been sorted out (House 106, Room 2, Hendrefoelan Village) and my student loan has been confirmed. I feel like a walking advert: Hashim Piperdy (no matter how many times I say, write or hear that name, it still feels slightly odd) ....NOW FOR x DAYS ONLY!! I'm leaving on the 20th September. It's gonna f'n rock.

Secondly, work. I hate it. I hate it. I hate it. Still, I've handed my notice in and I get my holiday money paid to me (70 hours pay). *EVIL LAUGH*

The next time I write in this, it will probably be before I go to Swansea.

Hashim Piperdy: ONLY 16 DAYS TO GO!!
It's Gonna F'n Rock
- Wednesday, September 03, 2003 at 17:20:05 (EDT)

There are 15 hours to go, no more needs to be said.

See you on the other side,
Hash
Bite those nails
- Wednesday, August 13, 2003 at 20:32:06 (BST)

Damn hospital and its lack of radio station!! Went there, found out that they have no radio station... ah well, hopefully Swansea will have a student radio station... just need to lose the Norfolk accent.

The pressure of exams has just hit me, even though they finished too many days to remember ago. Before and during the exams, I was being more irritable than I usually am because I was saying things like: "Bring 'em on" and the ilk (what a great word) whilst others were quietly nervous. Now, I'm getting worried that I haven't done that well. Normally I like pressure, right now because there IS NOTHING I can do about it, it worries me. However, because I can do nothing about it, perhaps I should stop worrying about the damn exams.

Worry number 2: My music tastes. They are a-changing. Whilst I'm still listening to quality (yeah, I said quality) like Audioslave, somw weird stuff is creeping in, stuff that I would normally not listen to, I mean Delta Goodrem for fox sake!? I have only one vague idea why... work. There is a radio and I have to listen to some of the most soul-destroying music imaginable (Daniel Bedingfield, Busted, Westlife anyone?) and this I fear is beginning to corrupt me. Next time I'm there, I'm gonna put on the most aggressive music I can find. While I'm on the subject of music, song to download: Fine Again by Seether.

I got one more worry, but it's been a long day and I'll save it.

I will have my vengeance,
Hash
Egg, meet face, face meet egg
- Thursday, July 17, 2003 at 20:25:17 (BST)

After my......emotional last entry, I've decide to attempt to tone it down a little, hell, emotions are ok but when you leave them open, they're bound to be slaughtered and I deserve to be verbally slaughtered. I've realised that this web diary is a privilege and I shouldn't have abused (?) it like that, it won't happen again.

Tomorrow is going to be something of a big day. It will be the first time, in 18 years where I will have asked for a job (sainsburys' doesn't count). Where this job be? Hospital, I'm firstly gonna see if they have a radio station and if they do, gain some voluntary work experience on it. I don't care if I have to make the tea for some washed-up DJ who likes to *adopts Smashy and Nicey voice* spin the wheels of steel, and now, here's Leonard Cohen mate, cos we all have to start somewhere, don't we? I think the phrase is paying my dues, maybe with a bit of luck, I can make it onto a radio station... what better job is there than to play music or to talk shite into a microphone and get paid for it?? And hell, if I'm unsuccessful, theres'always Swansea... but I don't want to get into a rant about my exam fears....just yet.

How good are the year 11 diaries?? I've never talked, or probably never even seen Becky or Soraya but reading their diaries, I've felt as if I've known them for a long time. Sounds odd, I know, but it is a testament to how good they're writing is. Whilst we're on the subject of other peoples' diaries, WILMA, get this into your mind, I AM NOT IN COMPETITION WITH YOU. Everything we ever seem to do is a competition to him and if it involves writing creatively, he will kill me every time.

We're all made of stars,
Hash
Hmmmm......leave untitled
- Wednesday, July 09, 2003 at 21:56:35 (BST)

It's just gone midnight and I'm feeling a bit down for reasons of my own...they involve someone else who is very special to me and because she won't talk to me, hopefully she will read this and realise what she means to me, it is the chorus to a song called In This Diary by the Ataris......

Being grown up isn't half as fun as growing up
These are the best days of our lives
The only thing that matters is following your heart
And eventually you'll get it right

Peace and love to everyone,
Hash
In This Diary........
- Wednesday, July 09, 2003 at 00:06:51 (BST)

Hi, just finished work....again. I just read Wilmas' last entry and a lot of it struck a chord. 14 years of education (with hopefully another 3) and so much has changed. Everyone is different from the start of sixth form to now. I don't just mean "hey, we're 2 years older", I mean our personalities, and our friends. Like at the start of Year 12, I don't think I'd ever talked to Carl Baker. By now, I consider him to be a good friend as he kept me sane through boring sociology lessons with his weird cryptic theories, the postmodern communist and yes, Carl, I know I owe you a tape, I just haven't had time yet...but it'll be worth it!

Will.........whats this about a feud?? Ok, it got heated in places, and chairs were smashed and somewhere, curiously strong mints (tm) were consumed but I never meant any of it, well......ok, I meant some of it but it was only words.

Hell, about the whole change thing, two years ago, I would never have been able to write about me, I'd just felt uncomfortable doing so. Now I'm happy for people to read about me (who actually reads this anyway?) and reading about other people is good...the yr 11 ones especially as I can remember *goes into old man mode* how I felt leaving after my GCSES, thinking "Sh*t, I'm gonna have to get a job" and not sleeping a bit the day before my results... it's gonna happen again, last year, I wasn't so bothered, now, there is a lot at stake, 3 years rests on the opening of an envelope...I hate pressure, and I hate waiting for my results, little letters that tell you whether you've wasted your time and whether it's time to fill out that Norwich Union application form.

Two last points, firstly that video was really well done, is there any chance of it being copied and sold? And lastly, the reaction I got....thanks to EVERYONE

Song to download: Big Sur by the Thrills.

The Building Has Left the Elvis,
Hash
Ch-Ch-Ch-Changes
- Wednesday, July 02, 2003 at 23:00:54 (BST)

Hello, It's been a while since I worte in this diary, same with others, I've been looking forward to what others have been saying, especially Fordy cos he speaks a lot of truth (shock) but they haven't updated theirs...yet.

Still, it's been a good day, I know it rained but that was cool, makes the sunshine better. Right now, I am very tired as I've just finished work and I attempted to out run the dog that keeps chasing me cos I smell of chicken...Why does his tosser of an owner leave the son of a bitch (literally) off his lead?

Just thinking about the last two years, how everyone has changed! Everyone seems to have found their happy little niche in Sixth Form; still it wasn't the same without Shea and Olly, to name but two. On the whole though, I enjoyed it. I met new people, fell out with people, and don't talk to some, which sounds bad, but is actually good cos I can keep in touch with the people I want to keep in touch with when I'm in Wales.

On top of that, I got a job! Sains*urys has its disadvantages, like actually having to work there, but it allowed me to get to know people I wouldn't have known otherwise and for that reason alone, it's been good.

If we all remember sixth form, I think it has to be remembered for King Jim, the mainly shite music played in the Common Room and the talking blender. Anyone that does remember will know I made that bit up.

Anyways, I know this'll read like crap cos a) i'm tired and confused and b) I haven't edited it at all, so apologies for that but hey, it was either this or a pop-up ad.

No one Ever Really Dies,
Hash
We're Different Than When It Started
- Monday, June 30, 2003 at 23:17:23 (BST)

Thanks to the doc... quality Hash! That's a good one. Anyway, just been to see The Matrix Reloaded - very good film, especially if you wanna see one man fighting with a giant pole...against 100's of the same person.

Anyway, I was listening to my radio before I went to sleep when the program I was listening to was talking about Aaron Barschak - the bloke that "invaded" Prince William's party. Honestly, who cares? It doesn't need a report,or an enquiry, or an inquisition to know that someone didn't do their job properly. It then got me thinking... why is failure so often talked about, when sucess hardly ever gets a mention. Think about it, Peter Risdale screws up Leeds, sending them £70MILLION in debt, and he gets £2million to leave? How does that work? People that do well are always resented - for example, people that do crap in exams are always talked about and someone that gets 3 A's or whatever gets a small mention... why? Failure is too often rewarded. Network Rail, a company in administration, their finance director recieves a £750,000 bonus! Why? I guess because bad news is all we want to hear about.

That felt good to get off my chest, I got to go to work tomorrow where I can share more grievances with scared customers...

If anyone wants to reply, slag me off, praise me (??) my e-mail address is hashimpiperdy@Hotmail.com. I'm gonna go listen to Soundgarden...see you later.
Failure?
- Wednesday, June 25, 2003 at 19:56:46 (BST)

Hey! I decided (or at least asked my parents) if I could get the net back on my PC....any they said yep! So I got a web diary and now you're stuck with my views...or you can go read Wilmas'.

Now, usually, I know what I wanna write cos I'm actually (shock) thinking about it but sometimes my thoughts and what I do write are a bit garbled. So if this ends up being crap....I'm sorry, if it's good, fantastic (I use that word cos I know it pisses Wilma off).

Anyhow, I'll leave my diary for the time being until I can think of something to worte....I may be some time....Hash

Just one question though: Who'd win the fight between 2 pigeons and 1 seagull?
Hello Everyone
- Tuesday, June 24, 2003 at 21:50:21 (BST)